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Here we the find the Carts in the most dichotomous of situations– at Hyde Bellagio in Las Vegas, sipping champagne (expected) and hoisting the Stanley Cup (completely and utterly unexpected). 

Meanwhile, his scavenging buddy, Mike Richards, may or may not have grab-assed this buxom, valley-titted clubgoer as he shuffled through a crowd loosely resembling the partiers in Eyes Wide Shut (presumably sans pubic hair).

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UPDATE: That's not just any clubgoer– per a reader in the comments, that's Stacie Hall from The Hills that Richie is grab-assing.

Photos of Carts, Richie and Simon, which come courtesy of the Hyde Bellagio’s Facebook page (via Puck Daddy and Vegas News), are best viewed while listening to Rihanna’s We Found Love.

Give it a little jump.

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Jeff has come a long way from La Costa:

image from mobilwi.typepad.com

Video, with painfully hurtful Rocky music mocking us: