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Somewhere, Sheena Parveen just perked up.

Just in case you were starting to feel better about the Phillies not being in the playoffs. Starting to enjoy the fine grey month of October. Enjoy the leaves falling. Pumpkin patches. ZOMG Pumpkin Spice Latte from Starbucks it’s soooo good and I must tell all my social network friends about it nomnomnomnomnomnomnom. Pumpkin beer because it’s, um, yeah, it’s actually pretty good. And fall sleeping weather. Just in case you were starting to enjoy those things and forget that the Phillies are sitting in their homes – their really large homes – watching the MLB Postseason on TBS (brought to you by Conan and that awful song from Bruce Springsteen) just like you, here’s a swift kick to your balls or ovaries:

The Giants beat the Reds in 10 innings last night, 2-1, to force a Game 4 in the NLDS. Hunter Pence, who is 1-for-the-series (12), battled through leg cramps during his 10th inning at-bat before singling on – I know this will come as a shock – a ground ball to the left side. His getting on base made way for a Scott Rolen error that allowed the Giants to score the game-winning run. 

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But it wasn’t Pence’s hit and his gutsy ambling down the first base line (I saw one person on Twitter liken it to a dog with worms) that had his teammates talking after the game. It was the speech that he gave before the game that was all the rage. 

[There’s a bad joke in here about him saying grace before his team went out to eat… but I just can’t seem to find it.] 

Here’s how teammate Jeremy Affeldt described the speech: [CBS Sports]

"Hunter was lively, he was pacing, he was getting loud, he was getting excited. He could have said nothing and how he said it, how he addressed the team, his approach to the message he gave, I think it just got everyone excited. He could have rattled off some poem, but the way he did it, he would have gotten guys excited. It was like a pre-football game type deal." 

 

And Giants coach Tim Flannery, apparently a musician, melodramatically paraphrased the speech on, randomly, his band’s Facebook page

"get in here, everyone get in here..look into each other eyes..now! look into each others eyes, I want one more day with you, it's the most fun, the best team I have ever been on" said the Reverend Hunter Pence. "And no matter what happens we must not give in, we owe it to each other, play for each other, I need one more day with you guys, I need to see what Theriot (jerry) will wear tomorrow, I want to play defense behind Vogelsong because he's never been to the playoffs..play for each other not yourself, win each moment, win each inning, it's all we have left"…………for me an old coach it moved me like I have never been moved before…purity, real, passion, soul. the last of the holdouts this Pence..no arrows being shot, no hey look at me, no spotlight on me, no dance but "play for each other"…honor the game the game honors you..don't know where and when it ends, but tonight I was proud to be together as a team, in a hostile environment, with just us..brothers that play for the name on the front, not the name on the back.

 

Ugh. I’m not sure if that gave me douche chills… or pissed me off that the Phillies had Pence under contract next year and now have no reliable outfielders.

Pence is struggling in the playoffs, again, and didn’t have the greatest of stretches with the Giants (he batted .219 with what would have been a career-low .671 OPS), but he still finished the 2012 season with 24 home runs and a career-high 104 RBIs. Something like that would have been nice to pencil into the lineup every day next year.

The folks over at Big League Stew have some more on Pence’s proverb, which was once a lame t-shirt slogan from the Phillies but now a rallying point for the Giants, who are still playing baseball.