lee_pissing_excellenceI swear I heard the sound of horseshoes clapping against pavement as Cliff Lee galloped off the mound last night after completing eight shutout innings, striking out eight, walking none, and throwing 78 of his 106 pitches for strikes in a 2-0 Phillies win. Our steed was so proud, so gallant, so… whatever. He had just pissed two hours of excellence onto a rain-soaked mound in cold Hotlanta.

Look at his pitch charts– only an equine with the largest hooves in the village could produce these sorts of devastating, and consistent, results:

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lee_chart charts via BrooksBaseball.net

Two-seamers between 90 and 92, fading 10 inches. 

Cutters, slicing off the barrels of bats.

Curve balls, falling off the table and into the next room at a cool 76. 

And changeups, decepting their way into the zone like little ninjas searching for a safe haven beneath the rainbow of excellence cascading over their heads.

After the game, Lee was so cool. His only concern… trying to get his headset to work for an interview with Scott Franzke and Larry Andersen. His mic check phrase of choice? Testes! Testes! Behold, our hero pony with an AV problem:

[soundcloud url=”http://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/86494824″ params=”” width=” 100%” height=”166″ iframe=”true” /]

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Video of Lee’s excellence.

Scott Barry goofed on a call at first. Erik Kratz was tagged out by Kevin’s brother Buzz Freddie Freeman, but Barry missed the call. The umpires later got it right. The whole incident, however, reminded of the time Ryan Howard nearly killed Scott Barry… and when LA went off on the young and horrible umpire.

A farewell to Daily News LiveOn Monday, CSN will debut Philly Sports Talk… which is basically the same show jammed into the NBC-Comcast-mega-conglomerate.

Hey the Flyers won again.

Your 2013 Citizens Bank Park Beer List courtesy of Lee Porter.

Kevin Ware does the Top 10 on Letterman.

Grab home opener tickets for under $50.