Hey, Let’s Make Fun of the Knicks

Kyle Scott —  May 2, 2013 — 12 Comments

Screen Shot 2013-05-02 at 9.27.59 AMSince there are no playoffs to talk about here (and won’t be for a record-setting nearly two years), we’ll just talk about other playoff series, in other cities. Not ours. Other cities. Especially when New York has a bad night.

What would Carmelo Anthony and the New York Knicks know about pressure? Well they have kissed a man… wait, no, but Kevin Garnett apparently fucked Carmelo’s wife, so that’s close enough. That’s pressure. So is a tightening series lead. And the Knicks are beginning to buckle under it… or on top of it… or maybe both.

Trying to make a statement that it was time to put away the Celtics – the team from Boston, where four people died as a result of a terrorist attack, mind you – the Knicks, holding a 3-1 lead, wore black to the arena for Game 5 last night because… it was time for the Celtics’ funeral. Besides that being wildly insensitive, it was also wildly inaccurate– they wound up losing, 92-86. In the process, Jordan Crawford told Carmelo about that motherfucker fucking his wife:

via CelticsLife.com

KG. He was talking about Garnett, who, in January, told Melo that his “wife tastes like Honey Nut Cheerios.”

Here’s what I want to know: does this happen in all sports? Athletes run and bump in the same circles. People like Gina Lynn have run the gamut from Scottie Upshall to Dan Uggla to, perhaps, Shane Victorino. Players have to go up against snowballed partners all the time. Like, there has to be some unwritten rule here, right? RIGHT?! Otherwise there’s no way we would have civility in sports. Eventually Kobe is going to allegedly rape some journeyman swing man’s wife or daughter. Scott Hartnell and Joffrey Lupul had to have swapped women at one point. And LeSean McCoy’s baby mama had to have called Osi Umenyiora by now. How do we not hear about this more often?

Anyway, nice work by the Celtics, at the very least they forced a Game 6 in Boston, and if the Knicks wear black up there, every first responder in Beantown should get a crack at digging their gun into La La’s hip… if they haven’t already.

Nobody can say no.

Kyle Scott

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12 responses to Hey, Let’s Make Fun of the Knicks

  1. ThePhillyFlash May 2, 2013 at 10:11 am

    Beyond being an insensitive thing for the Knicks to have done, it was stupid as hell to boot since that gave the Celtics plenty of bulletin board material, and they used it last night. Good for Boston! I hope KG and company roar back and win the series.

  2. 3 Finger Lenny May 2, 2013 at 10:16 am

    I would fuck la la’s big ole booty

  3. Relax with the whole funeral thing. It had nothing to do in relation with the Boston Marathon bombings and its victims. The Mavericks did it before Game 6 of the 2011 Finals before beating the Heat. Obviously Tyson Chandler brought over the little ritual. Granted it was stupid, and now the joke’s on the Knicks, but don’t overreact and try to make a connection with what happened at the Marathon.

  4. Diamond Dallas Page May 2, 2013 at 10:28 am

    Victorino would stick his dick into anybody! #sexaddict

  5. this is exactly why many people hate the NBA. only in the NBA would a team, who hadn’t won a playoff series in 13 years, have the audacity to wear black to a game in an attempt to mimic the burial of the other team. unreal! i hope the celtics take the series, but something tells me they’ll run out of gas come game 7.

  6. DeepDownSouth May 2, 2013 at 10:47 am

    I bet LaLa smiles like a honey nut cheerio for them coco puffs….\8-O gobble gobble

  7. Heard la la & her nice smelling vagina is in to chicks too

  8. Really? We’re all going to forget that the Celtics are one of the Sixers most hated rivals since forever? The Bird-Dr. J fight? stuff being thrown onto courts? Nah let’s take their side everyone from Philly.

    Granted the Sixers sucked this year, and in many recent previous years. The Eagles sucked this year, do we root for Dallas in a street-fight over the Cardinals? I’m thinking the answer is no.

    What the Knicks did was kinda stupid and premature given their recent playoff “success”. But as another commenter said, it was a carry over by Chandler, a team leader, from Dallas. It was poorly thought out and might have bit them in the ass, but that’s all.

    Oh and the guy who started all this months ago, KG. The dude who called Charlie Villanueva a “cancer patient” yeah, lets indirectly take his side. And that of Jordan Crawford, one of literally the worst players in the NBA who taunted out of turn about something even the pros shouldn’t really be trash talking about.

    Besides, this is Philly, if you’re going to use fighting words (which those were), aren’t we of all cities supposed to be in favor of backing them up? You think 6’2 Jordan Crawford wants anything to do with Melo? fuck no.

    • a lot of valid points made by you. hard for me to dispute much of what you said, especially KG being a POS. however, my disdain for new york is much stronger than my disdain for boston.

      • Exactly. New York fans are worse in my book. The Knicks success this season is hyped by the media and its fans to the point you’d think they were an established dynasty. Melo is the scoring champ, and probably the least efficient one of all-time.

        The Celtics’ era that began with their 08 title is coming to an end. I’m not rooting for the Celtics because they stand no chance this postseason to contend. I’m rooting against the Knicks. I’m glad the C’s have avoided the sweep and tired NY out a little more in anticipation if they move on.

  9. After reading this post, I’m 100% cheering for the Knicks. I have no idea why you’re making them out to be the bad guys here, black jerseys had absolutely nothing to do with the unfortunate bombing event. Garnett and Crawford seem like awesome people btw.

  10. I am 100% cheering for the Knicks in this series. I LOATHE the Celtics. How can any sixers fan like the Celtics more than the Knicks? Unfathomable.

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