The first step to quit being an asshole is to admit that you’re an asshole. I should know. I, myself, am an asshole, especially when it comes to discussing the Phillies.
Hello. My name is Kyle, and I’m an asshole. It’s been three hours and 12 minutes since my last asshole.
See how easy that is? Now it’s Howard’s turn:
No, no, no! You’re being an asshole, Howard! Look, I’m all for criticizing the Phillies for every dumb thing they do. In fact, in the absence of competitive professional baseball, it’s become a favorite pastime of mine. In the evenings, I eat dinner, have a beer, and then yell at no one in particular about dumb things the Phillies do. But even I can’t get on Ruben Amaro and the Phillies for not drastically overpaying for an unknown, mediocre talent. It was absolutely the right decision, if in fact they even had a say in it. The only argument to be made for overpaying for Rusney Castillo is if you’re a terrible team that just retooled its roster so you could be competitive again almost immediately and you’re paying Castillo a premium because he will help you get back on top… which the Red Sox have done over the past month… which is something the Phillies should’ve done two years ago when their players still had value. Dumb Phillies! They screwed up again.
Hello. My name is Kyle, and I’m an asshole…