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This is about where I’d sing Lee Greenwood’s God Bless The USA, because right now, a Mo’ne Davis signed Little League baseball is going for (with 12 hours remaining) $510!

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The listing even comes complete with a horribly-lit picture of Mo’ne (allegedly) signing the ball:

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A few things:

1) Assuming this thing is real, I must say, I love Mo’ne’s signature. When I was 31 13, I used to practice my autograph in a black and white composition notebook, trying out all sorts of crazy, swirly designs just in case I ever became a famous athlete. God help the world if I had. I would’ve been such a prick with an obnoxious autograph to match it. But not Mo’ne. Like everything else she does, she’s just a kid, signing shit with bad handwriting like she’s writing her name on the attendance slip for science class.

2) Mo’ne. If this doesn’t solidify her reaching one-name status, I don’t know what does.

3) Don’t pay $510 for this. I’m not an autograph guy, so I’d probably only pay $500 for signatures from, in this order: Babe Ruth, Steve Jobs, John Hancock and Jesus (and his would require a verifying face-stamp). But if you really want Mo’ne’s signature, just hire a kid to steal her spelling homework or something. Don’t buy this.

Anyway, weird times right now. In 12 years, we’re going to look back on 2014 as the year a 13-year-old girl was the most famous athlete, people dumped water on their heads, cops terrorized citizens in Missouri, and the 777 magic trick began.

H/T to (@EFQZ)