There’s a sentence I never thought I’d write. I just assumed that Car Bomb would either get kicked out of the league or announce his retirement through an Instagram video of himself riding on a jet ski with two tiny-bikini-ed blondes and the caption “I’m on a boat, m*therfucker.”

Alas.

Carcillo, who inexplicably attendant two Stanley Cup parades on moving vehicles, said the death of friend Steve Montador, who, like Carcillo, also suffered from substance and alcohol abuse problems, deeply affected him and will steer him going forward.

Here’s what Car Bomb ticked off on The Players Tribune— one of the best sports websites on the planet:

In April, when I decided to sit down and talk about how Monty and many other players have struggled to transition to life outside of hockey, I was nervous about how it would be received. The unspoken sentiment is that you don’t talk about this kind of stuff in the hockey world. It can be seen as a “distraction.” When I reached out to my teammates on the Blackhawks to tell them what I was doing, I was really surprised by the reaction. They couldn’t have been more supportive. After the video came out, I had a number of current and former NHL players reach out to me to say that they’re struggling with the same issues.

Today, I’m retiring from the National Hockey League. My immediate goal is to help athletes transition to the next phase of their life — whether it’s continuing education, finding internships with companies, or networking with other athletes who are dealing with the same issues. My mission is to help guys who are dealing with anxiety, depression, and uncertainty about their future. Not down the line, not next week, but right now.

Here’s the earlier video to which he was referring: