Look, I have no illusions about what making $125 million over any five-year span will get you (spoiler: A LOT), and I have seen and posted countless photos of the construction of Ryan Howard’s Florida castle, but these pictures sent to me by my friend, who’s in the F-L-A visiting family, are insane. Look at this F-ing place:

Like, we’ve joked about the moat and the castle thing, but that TOWER, which I guess houses a round staircase, could’ve been used as a lookout in King’s Landing.

Not to be outdone, HughE Dillon brings us some news on the Hamels. Heidi is now a country song writer (of course she is), and she and Cole are selling their 32,000 square foot Missouri mansion for $10 million. LOOK AT THIS PLACE:

That’s… excessive.

From the listing:

Once in a lifetime opportunity to own this luxury lakefront estate at a fraction of the cost to build. This well designed French provincial home is situated on 104.7 acres with over 1700 feet of shoreline access and a private dock. With the exterior near completion, the home is being offered with an unfinished interior to serve as a blank canvas for a new owner to put the finishing touches on. Inside you will find this home boasts an amazing 10 bedrooms, 13 full bathrooms, 6 half baths and 4 separate living areas in nearly 32,000 square feet of space. The entire home has been constructed to commercial building code standards, including fire sprinklers as not to limit the use of the property. If quality is what you a seeking, this is it. Own the finest property the Ozarks has to offer!

But sometimes all the money in the world can’t buy you success. Howard signed a minor league deal with the Rockies and went 1-for-6 in his debut with the Albuquerque Isotopes, though he did hit a double:

Take the good with the bad.