Crossing Broad

Streaker! Naked Man Runs on the Field at Busch Stadium, Franzke and LA Discuss

WE’RE GOING STREAKING!

Before the start of the seventh inning last night, a St. Louis man went streaking in the outfield at Busch Stadium. The above photo, taken by the AP's Jeff Roberson, is perhaps the finest and most ironic streaker photo our country will ever see. More like a take-off hero.

Several revealing videos after the jump, plus Scott Franzke and Larry Andersen react with a meta reminder that the streaker is copyright of the Phillies and accounts or descriptions of his existence may not be disseminated without the express written consent of the Phillies.

Kevin Garnett Hates You, Thinks You Suck

It figures that following a day where Bryce Harper mentioned fans throwing batteries and the MLB.com Twitter account brought up throwing snowballs at Santa, Kevin Garnett would call out Philly fans for being fair-weather. 

Here’s what he told reporters after last night’s game:

“When speaking about this crowd, man, it’s like plugging in. They enthused for 48 minutes on. From the tip on. So I can’t see the difference between minute to minute. I feel like every minute I look up, I see my family, I see people yelling, I see the drunk fat guy. This crowd is ridiculous, man, I love it. It’s like taking a cold shower, steeping into a freezer that’s below 60. I wouldn’t recommended it, but if you want the feeling try it out come back let me know.”

Can you compare Boston fans to the fans in Philly?

“Not even close. You know, we got fans here, then you got fair-weather fans. Take it how you want.” 

 

Damn. See, I always liked Garnett. Now I’ll have to puke on a little girl while throwing batteries and tasing him. 

The comment was completely unnecessary, but certainly not unintentional. Garnett has been around long enough to know exactly what he’s saying. And he’s exactly the type of weirdo that, especially at this old age of 36, can use boos to fire himself up and elevate his game. In fact, part of me believes he said what he did on purpose, just so he can be showered with boos by 20,000 fair-weather fans on Wednesday night. 

But that still doesn’t mean his statement is accurate.

Garnett has only been with the Celtics since 2007, meaning most of his experience playing in Philadelphia has come since then, in the final years of a Sixers ownership group that seemingly cared little about winning, results, and fan interest. The Sixers have been laughable for much of the last decade until this season. Plus, Garnett’s experience in Philly is obviously limited to basketball. I’d entertain his argument when it comes to the Phillies (see 1994-2005), but good luck trying to tell anyone that Eagles and Flyers fans are fair-weather. Hell, Flyers fans are so fucking nuts that sometimes I think we enjoy the down times more than the good times, just so we can drink and bitch and drink and carry pitchforks and stuff... and drink.

CBSPhilly.com’s Spike Eskin, whose desk may or may not be adorned with Sixers pom poms, used some fuzzy math to disprove Garnett’s statement. He said, during down years in 2004 and 2005, Celtics percent capacity figures were similar to what the Sixers see now, around 85%. That’s true, but what he didn't mention is that, as recently as the 2009-2010 season, the Sixers’ lowest attended season since the mid-90s, the then Wachovia Center was only at 70% capacity. The Celtics never came close to that, even when they struggled between 2003-2007. 

Video via WEEI

Two Yinzers Ripped a PNC Park Security Guard's Finger Off This Weekend

I should tell you that this post is being written live from a Panera Bread, where a man, who I don’t know, decided that roughly 18 open tables didn’t suit his needs and he would plug his computer in and sit at my table, across from me. 

So I bring you this story while sharing a desk with a man I’ve never met. If my words suddenly come to halt, either John Quinones showed up... or I’m dead.

...

Yinzers ripped a PNC Park security guard’s finger off this weekend.

Really.

A Pittsburgh Post-Gazette story tells us about Rachel George, 21, and her father, Christopher, 50, who attacked a security guard and police officer while Rachel was being escorted out of the stadium after she was caught smoking in her seat. Things got out of hand rather quickly: 

As Pirates security supervisor Joseph Risher was escorting her out of the right field gate, Ms. George's unidentified boyfriend assaulted him and ran off. Ms. George jumped on the guard's back and started to pull him backward, the complaint says.

Her father joined in the attack, pushing him up against a fence.

"While defending himself, Mr. Risher got his left hand caught on the fence, and when he was pulled by both (defendants) his left middle finger was ripped off at the second knuckle and was hanging by a piece of skin," Detective Rende wrote in the complaint.

 

A police officer also injured his shoulder while placing Rachel in a stadium holding cell (yep, other cities have them too). 

Mr. Risher’s finger was later reattached during surgery. 

Classic Shittsburgh right there, folks. I mean, from their look to the act. Smoke-stained, greasy dirty blonde hair? Check. Rustic handlebar mustache accompanied by hollow, lonely eyes? Yep. Getting kicked out of a stadium for puffing on a cigg then assaulting a security guard and ripping off his fucking finger? Oh you bet. A three rivers trifecta right there.

Sadly, this won’t live on in sports infamy, but if it happened in Philly it surely would.

H/T to readers Adam, Steve, Dave, and the guy sitting acr

Jayson Werth: "I'm Motivated to See to it Personally Those People Never Walk Down Broad Street in Celebration Again"

Well, if our goal for taking over right field at NATITUDE Park last night was to get under the skin of Jayson Werth... mission accomplished?

Werth awoke from surgery today and could think of nothing better to do than email Adam Kilgore of the Washington Post. It seems the $126 million right fielder didn’t like what he heard coming from Phillies fans after he broke his wrist while attempting to make a sliding catch in the sixth inning:

In an e-mail to the Post, Werth said Phillies fans in right field at Nationals Park taunted him as he walked off the field Sunday night. And he will remember them during his rehab.

“After walking off the field feeling nauseous knowing my wrist was broke and hearing Philly fans yelling ‘You deserve it,’ and, ‘That’s what you get,’ I am motivated to get back quickly and see to it personally those people never walk down Broad Street in celebration again,” Werth wrote. 

 

Get over us, you weirdo.

I guess Werth didn’t hear the 400 or so folks, spread over two sections (some of whom were with our group, some not), applauding as he slogged off the field.  

You see, I recall it happening a bit differently than how Jayson described it. But hey, what do I know? My mind was clouded with a few beers. Surely I wasn’t thinking clearly, the way a person who was writhing around in pain after snapping their wrist would be thinking clearly. Surely the mind concerns itself with picking out exact phrases, from select individuals, seated 150 feet away, under such circumstances. Surely Werth was concentrating on distinguishing a few select lines out of what was largely an entire stadium, packed to the gills with NATITUDE, applauding him on his unfortunate trek to the dugout. 

Surely he heard what he heard.

Surely. Surely! SURELY!!!!

Bullshit.

Sixers Beat Bulls, Fan Body Surfs Escalator

1...2...3...4...5... hey, is that a guy riding down the escalator railing?

Indeed it is. Indeed. It.Is.

How much you want to bet he was heading to PBR?

Pic via our friends at The School Philly, who should have been graduating tonight

A Roundup of NATITUDE

Photo via Mark Zuckerman (@MarkZuckerman) of CSN Washington

LET’S. IGNITE. OUR. NATITUDE. 

Do you feel that? I mean, do you feel that? That burning in your soul. That... NATITUDE? 

No... wait... just a little post-nasal drip. Should be all cleared up in a week.

 - clears throat -

You remember that scene in Major League 2 where Roger Dorn couldn’t pay the bills and had to put ads all over the outfield walls to meet payroll, and when the players and Harry Doyle first saw the new decor they were dumbfounded? Well, that’s sort of how I envision Nats players reacting today when they walked into the stadium and saw that their lunatic COO had renamed the stadium NATITUDE PARK. Like, actually went out and got humongous banners made to fit perfectly the entranceways and scoreboard.

Nats manager Davey Johnson:

Here’s a roundup of the coverage surrounding the upcoming series, with quotes from yours truly in the Washington Post and WSJ.

[Washington Post]

Still, Philadelphia fans are planning to come. “We kind of laugh at it,” said Kyle Scott, the founder and editor of the Philadelphia sports blog “Crossing Broad” who has organized a bus trip, with close to 200 fans, for Sunday night’s game. “We’re going to come down there and take over the park one way or another. They’re not going to stop us.”

 

A hilarious read from Richard Rys of Philly Mag:

Then came the icing on our hate-cake. You signed your military giveaway letter, “With Natitude.” With all due respect, we’ve seen a field-crashing fan tasered to the cheers of a sold-out CBP crowd. We’ve watched Yankees pitchers rattled by the noise of a playoff game in our house. We know Pat Burrell has some kinky threads in his closet, but we’re welcoming him back in retirement anyway. Mr. Feffer, you don’t know from attitude, and if you did, you wouldn’t sign off with a lame pun.

In closing, I’m looking forward to wearing my Phillies gear to Saturday’s game and cheering loudly, along with an army of my brethren. In your goal to keep your park Philadelphia-fan free, you failed miserably. But look on the bright side. You’ve succeeded in creating a rivalry. At least for one weekend. 

 

Nats COO Andrew Feffer declined to speak with the Inquirer or Daily News:

The Daily News attempted for several days to speak with Feffer. A Nationals spokesman told us he would be unavailable for comment. When reminded that he had spoken with WTOP, the spokesman said Feffer could "only accommodate requests from local and national media." (Memo to Andy: If you have an online presence - which the Daily News obviously does - you are national media.)

 

[Note to Markus Kram, who wrote that article: The Wall Street Journal, New York Times, Washington Post and ESPN all reached out to me for comment about our promoting of what I assume is the largest D.C. trip this weekend. Yet, in this article, entitled Phils Fans Set For March On Washington, you just quoted a few folks from his Facebook page. Seems lazy.] 

[Wall Street Journal]

But Mr. Feffer says his campaign also "has become a civic issue" aimed at upending the conventional wisdom that D.C.'s transient population isn't as devoted to its teams as fans in other cities are to theirs.

Such talk has only raised the stakes for the Phillies series. The Sunday night game will be nationally televised, and Mr. Feffer acknowledges it would be a huge embarrassment if the crowd were dominated by Philadelphia supporters. He recently sweetened the pot, offering two free tickets to future games against other teams to anyone who buys two tickets to the Phillies series—a move designed to appeal to locals. Nationals officials said Wednesday the moves appear to be working and that the club's internal numbers show fewer out-of-area ticket sales than in years past.

 

7:05 this eve.

For Realsies For A Moment: Don't Be An Idiot If You Go To D.C. This Weekend

They had bases made... cute

Last night, reader Ryan sent me an email with something that was posted on the Nationals Facebook page. I couldn’t find the link to see it for myself, but that doesn’t matter. The message is a good one:

Emotions will be running high this weekend, so please be on your guard, Natstown. This website is a reminder of the dangerous situations you may find yourself in at the park and how to keep yourself safe. http://www.fansagainstviolence.org/

Hopefully, we will all escape this weekend unscathed and not throw rocks at hornets’ nests again!

 

While the rhetoric surrounding the game (from us, radio stations and even the Nationals themselves) has reached extraordinary heights, we must point out that it’s a sporting event. Entertainment. Despite the military-grade terms being thrown around, it’s all in good fun. Sports rivalries are healthy and the perfect way for the common man (or woman) to feel like he (or she) has a cause to fight for. A greater good, if you will.  

Philly fans get a bad rap, undeservingly so. Bad stuff happens everywhere. This you know. That fucking rhymed! But, especially with our trip coinciding with ESPN’s national telecast on Sunday night, any incident will be yet another line on the endless list of bad Philly fan behavior compiled by the national media. We don’t want that. We don’t want anyone to get hurt, fight, or do anything similarly stupid. 

Our group will come in relative peace. We may take over, but we’re not going to be idiots... even if we’re not all that smart (derp). We’re going to be loud, support the Phillies, laugh at the Nationals, heckle the bejesus out of Jayson Werth, and perhaps have a drink or two-- not start trouble or pick fights. I’ve mentioned this to every reporter I’ve spoken to about our trip. It’s a game, folks. And we expect that our rival Nats fans understand this, too... all six of them (I’M KIDDING-- look, my tongue is in my cheek, the way chicks do when they make blow job face).  

It’s an early May baseball game. I think that all of us - both Philly and D.C. folk - can agree that there are much more important things to genuinely quarrel over. Sports are entertainment, and that’s the way I’ve always ran this site. Yes, we plan on showing up, being loud and supporting our team, but we also respect that everyone in attendance - Nats fan or otherwise - is entitled to do the same.  And those of you who are coming on our buses will be reminded of that before we leave our fine city. 

Now if you'll excuse me... I have to unbunch my underwear.

Nationals Issue a Guide on How to be a Nationals Fan

Photo by JDLand.com, via D.C. Sports Bog

There are many embarrassing things related to being a Nationals fan, and we’re not going to rehash them here (we’ve spent the last two months or so doing that). What we are going to do, however, is point and laugh at the latest effort by the Nats to manufacture the perfect, passionately intense proud fan.  

Yesterday, the Nationals posted a “Fan’s Guide to NATITUDE Weekend” (yes, the style guides say it's capitalized) on their official blog, Curly W. Now, you might think that such a guide would include details about pre-game events, honorees, matchups, etc. No. No it doesn’t. It’s a guide on... how to be a fan of the Washington Nationals, providing surface-level information for fans to arm themselves with as knowledgeable Phillies fans #takeover.

The Phillies call this sort of thing "Baseball 101 Clinic for Women," and it's held once each season.

Some frighteningly amateurish, embarrassing, bush league, are you kidding me? highlights from the Nats guide:

Well, it’s finally here. Welcome to NATITUDE Weekend at Nationals Park, the first three-game set of the year against the rival Phillies. If you are planning to attend any (or all) of this weekend’s games, here’s a handy guide to help arm you with the NATITUDE you need to show the Philly fans who decided to make the trip south to Our Park that Washington is ready to turn the tide both on the field and off. 

 

The Nationals are off to a great start to 2012, and it helps to understand just how good they’ve been so far. As any Phillies fan will tell you, pitching is all-important in building a winner.

 

Were you aware that the Nationals beat Philadelphia, 10-8, in the season series in 2011, including the final five games?

 

There’s this guy named Bryce

They may boo him, but every opposing fan will have their eyes trained on home plate when 19 year-old Bryce Harper digs in. The outfielder turned in the first three-hit game of his young career on Wednesday, and is already altering games on defense with his cannon of an arm. Make sure you’re in your seat when Harper bats – you just might witness a piece of history.

 

Root, root, root for the home team

Bring your passion and energy to Our Park to cheer for the Nats. It’s going to be a fun, rowdy environment for sure, so bring your yelling voice. But should you run into some unruly visiting fans, don’t worry about wasting it on them. Let them regale you with stories about their .500 ballclub, and about how good they used to be. You know, in the past. Just take the high road and Ignite Your NATITUDE to support the NL East-leading Nats, the most exciting young team in baseball. 

 

Phew, I was ready for that to explain why a stolen base doesn’t land a player in jail. 

In case you needed any more anecdotal evidence of the type of pure, unadulterated passion Nats fans will be bringing to the baseball court (that’s what it’s called, right?), here’s Kenny Dixon, as described by Philly.com:

Kenny Dixon, 34, is a Marine from Georgia stationed in Quantico, Va. A season-ticket holder, he attended Wednesday's game with his wife and three kids and admitted he is an Atlanta Braves fan who also loves the Nationals.

He does not enjoy the annual invasion of Phillies fans.

"When the Phillies come into town, [their fans] sit out there and drink all day and they are just a bunch of idiots," Dixon said. "Honestly, if I was in Philadelphia to watch a game, I'd wear a Phillies T-shirt and go to the game and watch it because . . . when in Rome. 

 

Yeah, see, when in Rome, we wear this: 

We also don’t need to be reminded who bats third for our team.

This Girl Recorded a Claude Giroux Love Song

Slide over, this chick. Claude Giroux has a new super fan, and she has lyricals.

Ever wanted to hear an emo-Dixie Chicks-Sixpence None The Richer-that band who opened for Friends-sounding love song to Claude Giroux? 

What’s that, you have?

Well, boy are you in luck!

Last night, Jess Goldey sent us her song, Orange G-Sus, I’d Cook You Grilled Cheeses, and, well, it’s not terrible (my sick mind saw the word cock in there the first time I read it-- don’t lie, yours did too).

Goldey, of course, is playing on Giroux’s love for the delicious combination of melted dairy product and crispy bread. 

Some lyricals:

The way that you play hockey makes me feel tingly inside 

I can only imagine how great it'd feel if you let me call you mine. 

Hey G, for what it's worth, I think you're way better than Crosby. 

'Cuz he's a whiny bitch and you're a real man, not a pussy. 

 

So just let me know, we can take it slow. 

I'm not tryna be your wife. 

But I was kinda hoping you'd be into making out once or twice. 

 

Hey Claude Giroux, 

Hey Claude Giroux. 

Hey Claude Giroux….. 

….I wanna date you.

 

The use of I’m not tryna be your wife cracks me up for some reason. Nice work by Jess.

You can download the full song here.

Xfinity Live! Caught Serving Minors, Responds To Complaints

Pitbull's "Give Me Everything," being played in classic German style

Last night, FOX Philly did a little bit of investigative work on drinking at Xfinity Live!, detailing in two separate reports a finding by the PA liquor control board that a minor was served alcohol, and other incidents of general debauchery.

On April 18, one underage person, working undercover with the LCB, was served alcohol five separate times, apparently by five separate vendors. And, this weekend, FOX documented numerous occasions of people being escorted out of or stumbling from the building. 

[FOX Philly]

The investigator had come here probing complaints that the place was packed to the rafters, causing fights.

Investigators returned on April 18, the night of a big Flyers-Penguins matchup, only this time with an underage person looking to buy booze. It was no trouble at all.

Pennsylvania State Police have slapped Xfinity Live with a letter telling them they sold to a minor five times, a serious violation likely to bring a citation.

 

It’s the sort of thing that goes on, on some level, at nearly every large bar or entertainment district or whatever you want to call it. A few 20-year-olds are bound to be served, a few drunks will puke and remove the bathroom stall door, fights will happen, and people will slither out not knowing which way is up or who they’re going home with. Some of us call that Saturday. But, the fact that Xfinity Live! has already drawn complaints from the LCB (and some of you in the comments and on Twitter)... well, it’s noteworthy.

I spoke with Comcast-Spectacor PR man Ike Richman, who issued this statement:

With more than 300,000 visitors coming through Xfinity Live! since we opened, we believe this is an isolated incident in which an undercover police office was able to get past security. We take this VERY seriously and have increased security, added ID scanners, and increased check points, to assure that it never occurs again.  

I can tell you that we have been checked by the LCB on several other accounts and have had no issues at all.  

Again, we take this very seriously and we will do everything we can to assure our patrons that this is a safe, fun and exciting venue for everyone. 

 

The fact that one underage person was served alcohol on one afternoon isn’t exactly the most damning accusation in the world. I’d posit that nearly every bar - especially one serving 300,000 people in 30 days (my word!) - has served an underage person at some point, whether they were caught or not. Bartenders, as a whole, are not usually pillars of solid judgement (sorry, 'tenders... love you).

What stands out to me, though, is the mention of crowds and the place being “packed to the rafters.” Richman told me that Xfinity Live! never exceeds its capacity, which is nearly 2,800 humans and one mechanical bull, but that doesn’t mean the joint isn’t entirely too small for that many people to hang comfortably. That’s the issue here-- not the one documented instance of underage drinking, rather the fact that you can’t move when something - anything - is going on in there. 

Back when I was given a preview of the place in December, my lone question centered on whether the place would be too crowded.

I wrote:

But how crowded will it be? McFadden’s is a standalone option, too, yet I still get penetrated by meatheads if I take two steps to my right. 

You read my mind-- I don’t like getting penetrated by meatheads, either. To me, McFadden’s isn’t a pleasurable experience on game days... neither is a crowded Ashburn Alley. Both have decent offerings, and great location, but the appeal is lost by having to deal with the ridiculous crowds. What should be an enjoyable experience turns into a fight just to get a beer and a pork sandwich.

That’s my concern with Xfinity Live! 

Ultimately, Chickie’s and Pete’s is successful as a pre and post-game option because, while crowded, it manages the masses beautifully. You may wait for a seat, but the bar area is wide-open and service is insanely fast, though not rushed. 

Xfinity Live! is going to be big and have many open areas, but if the crowds aren’t managed properly or there are bottlenecks in bad spots, the whole experience could suffer. From the images I’ve seen, the design looks open enough, though.

 

The building itself, the amenities, the 32-foot HD screen, food and beer selections are mostly decent. The problem is that they’re nearly impossible to enjoy during peak hours, which is most of the time at Xfinity Live!. The place becomes a massive bar, not a dining and entertainment district. And with that comes LOUD NOISES and the type of people who are out to get shitfaced. There’s nothing wrong with that, but it’s just now happening on a massive, corporate-funded scale, in the middle of the sports complex. Which leads to mass drunkenness, fights, not enough taxis, and these types of stories.  

That’s the takeaway here: Comcast isn’t out to serve alcohol to minors or incite chaos. They’re just struggling through the growing pains of the place being too small.

Videos of FOX’s reports are after the jump.

Video: Drunk Devils Fan Carried Out Of Game 1

To be honest, it's hard to tell if this is a Devils fan. But, according to reader Ryan, who passed along this video of a slowly coming-uncloaked woman being escorted out of the Wells Fargo Center on Sunday, the creature we’re staring at does, indeed, pull for the New Jersey Devils. So don’t look so surprised as you watch security and police carry her convulsing body down the steps of section 212.

A second video, via (@MJohn307), is after the jump.

Jersey Foul: Flyers Fan Wears "The Black Guy" Simmonds Jersey to Game

Pic via (@Frankie_Ice7)

Not even sure how to react here. My first reaction was to chuckle, mostly because someone had the balls to get this made. The second reaction - and probably the correct one - was to just shake my head. It’s one thing to acknowledge (and perhaps even joke about) black hockey players, since there are so few of them (currently 28), but it’s another thing to walk around the Wells Fargo Center wearing Wayne Simmonds’ #17 with a nameplate reading “The Black Guy.”

There’s a big difference between acknowledging the fact that the Flyers have a black player on their roster and going out of your way to point it out. Clearly, this guy lacks the undefinable filter that discriminates between humorous social commentary and just being an idiot.

This of course comes just a few days after Simmonds gave his thoughts on hockey fans hurling the n-word around Twitter in response to Capitals forward Joel Ward scoring the Game 7 winner against the Bruins.