Our friends at Drinker’s Philadelphia sponsor this segment. Nothing changes, except we can now have contests for legit prizes to Drinker’s.

The Vanimal: This isn’t a slight to Vance, but per the points I made here, sell high if you can.

Werth beers: I go under $2.40. He would have to raise his average over 20 points – something that is difficult to do in the second half of the season – to get Duffy’s beers over $2.40. 

If anything, his first half struggles have just proven what an utter failure he is going to be in living up to this contract. It probably won’t be that bad, but $126 million players don’t have woeful halves like that. If anyone tries to respond with “Ryan Howard,” I’m going to donkey punch them with his 72 first half RBIs.

Post World Cup Soccer: I’m buying.

As I Tweeted last night, I’m on a five-week quest to understand and appreciate the game. I watched the Union match, Real Madrid, and played copious amounts of FIFA ’11 on the PS3 (and you’re wondering why I got a late start today). 

Early observations: I’ve learned that the little scoring you see is only part of the story. So much strategy goes into seemingly every ball movement. Controlling the play, so you are able to set up effective scoring chances, seems to be about 90% of the game, er, match.

I’m really enjoying the skill involved with playing futbol at a high level. Perhaps only in baseball will you see such advanced skills on display (I’d argue basketball, football, and hockey are more athleticism based, relatively speaking). Maybe this is because I’m a newbie… but I was really impressed with the inhuman coordination I saw in the Real Madrid match last night, and I look forward to seeing them play on Saturday.

That being said, the diving really needs to go. It wasn’t nearly this prevalent in the Women’s World Cup, and it gives the whole sport a bit of a WWE feel. Even the part where the offending player comes over and checks on the injured feels staged. He has to know he’s faking, right?

From most folks who have given their two cents, it seems like watching high-level Euro soccer is the way to go. I anticipate choosing a Premier League or La Liga team to root for, should my five-week study prove successful.

Crossing Broads: Just let it be known that those are stretch marks on bleacher handy girl’s stomach. I’ll take the other one, thank you.

Crossing Bros: Girooooooooooux. Vance probably sweats. A lot.

Bigfoot: Yesterday, we learned that Cliff Lee believes in Bigfoot, like ambitiously so. So, um, yeah: Go Sasquatch, go!

Today’s Drinker’s challenge: Enter for your chance to win a “Big Bash” for four people on any Friday or Saturday night at Lucy’s. Must be 21.

Enter after the jump.