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It’s fitting that a Broad Street Bullies movie would be produced by Rob Zombie. Not Steven Spielberg or Christopher Nolan or Michael Bay or even Mel Gibson. But Rob Zombie. 

Rob Zombie. 

Deadline.com:

Rob Zombie will write, direct and produce Broad Street Bullies, a film about the Philadelphia Flyers hockey team that evolved from a cellar dwelling expansion team into a team that racked up victories and penalty minutes in equal measure during the 70s. Zombie, known for his head-banging music before transitioning to genre films like House of1000 Corpses and Halloween, is making a departure with this film, sort of, because the Flyers brutal style of play is genre-worthy and has the makings for a hockey film on the order of the 1977 sports film classic Slap Shot.

 

This is real. Not a joke. Not satire. Actually happening, according to the site.

Filming will begin soon, the article says, but there are no details given about who will star in the movie. We do have this, though– Zombie’s vision of Rocky meets Boogie Nights: 

Zombie got the rights to the team’s story, and has the full support of the Flyers organization. He likened the tone of the tale to Rocky meets Boogie Nights on ice. “Each character involved is more outrageous than the next,” Zombie said. “The backdrop of the turbulent year of 1974 is perfect for this ‘stranger than fiction’ sports tale.”

 

I can just see it now: Don Saleski running through the streets of Philadelphia with his crazy hair and great big cock, punching meat. And perhaps it’s fitting that Zombie would reference Boogie Nights, since it’s a near guarantee that Mark Wahlberg will be in the movie. Movies aren’t made in Philly without the express written consent of the Wahlberg. 

image from www.jewmalt.com

Finally, we have a quote from Bobby Clarke about the great Rob Zombie:

Former Flyers great and team senior vice president Clarke is appropriately stoked. “The great Rob Zombie making a drama feature film about the Broad Street Bullies is exciting and thrilling for all of us! I look forward to seeing it.”

 

I’m completely speechless. There’s no way that Clarke, whose daughter is writing a book about the personal lives of past and present Flyers (due out in November), even knew who Rob Zombie was before some hipster film writer called him asking for a quote. No chance, eh.

Anyway, we’re taking votes on casting for the movie in the comments. Look for a post on that soon.

H/T to (@MartyBuckley), (@MParisano91) and (@deifert5)