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That’s Flyers PR man Zack Hill trying hard to hold back a smile

There’s always those scenes in blockbuster movies where the antagonist – Raoul in Skyfall and pretty much every Batman bad guy ever are examples – obnoxiously grandstands about his or her principles (while failing to mention their own shortcomings…) just before meeting their ultimate fate, which is death or banishment.

That was Ilya Bryzgalov yesterday.

In his thick, perfect-Bond-bad-guy accent, Bryz ripped the media for lousy reporting, citing ethics and the greater good as reasons to be better scriptuals. In his mind, he may not be the hero Philly deserves, but he’s the one it needs. Go:

“You guys just here to blame someone, but you never look yourself in the mirror, right? You’re always good, you never make the mistakes. Your article’s always perfect. But in reality, what have you done for this city, if you ask yourself? What have you done? Ask yourself that question. Besides only criticize. Well, not much.”

“Need to be fair, need to see the whole picture. It’s easy to criticize…  it’s tough to find something good.”

“Sometimes it’s just ridiculous. Sometimes you reading and it’s like, oh my God, who’s this lunatic you’re writing about? Because it was nothing close to the truth or close to related to hockey. You read this, and it’s like, oh my God, I got to deal with these people everyday. Like I said before– before you write something, you got to read what you’re writing. Because I never saw it. I’m two years here, I never saw it like for two years– good article, with, like, Flyers lose the game because this, this, this, this this. They need to improve their team, like this, this, this or this. I’ve never. That’s what you call professionalism. That’s where you can say: OK, this reporter knows hockey, he knows what he’s talking about.”

“I [read] a lot [of articles]. We have some clips in the locker room pretty much everyday. I read a lot, believe me.”

Hard facts, then: Bryz had a 2.79 goals-against average (36th in the league) and a .900 save percentage (43rd in the league).

Unfortunately, Bryz may be too busy ranting to notice a stealthy Paul Holmgren perched in a ventilation duct above with a shotgun and an amnesty exemption.

Must-see video after the jump.