Screen Shot 2013-05-16 at 12.21.10 PMRyan Lawrence hasn’t responded to my challenge to defend my title in the Home Runs For Heart Media Day hitting contest that I wasn’t invited to this year. Nope. He just took my trophy and ran. But I’m over it. I’ll always own the left field power alley for non-sensical hitting events at CBP (this includes batting practice for Phillies outfielders) and Lawrence can’t do anything about it. Now I need a new challenge. Something else to be incredibly obnoxious about.

Would you like to kick my ass? If you find yourself nodding and mouthing yes to that question or are this guy…

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… then here’s your chance.

If Lawrence doesn’t want a showdown, then I’m giving you, the CB reader, an opportunity. This summer I’m accepting challenges… in anything. Think you are a better free-throw shooter than me? Have a 90 mph fastball you think you can blow by me? Are you Chris Therien and do you want to race me around a rink? Fill out this form and describe what you think you can kick my ass in. It can be athletic, beer pong, trivia, assorted games of skill and chance. Whatever. I’ll pick the best ones and come onto your turf. We’ll film it and put it on this the site and make you all sorts of famous and get you lots of ladies who are totally turned on by guys who were on blogs. Now’s your chance: Beat a Blogger.

Group requests are fine. But I probably won’t be allowed to except orgy invites, which should disappoint all the writers at Jezebel.

[contact-form][contact-field label=’Name’ type=’name’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Email’ type=’email’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Where would it be held?’ type=’text’ required=’1’/][contact-field label=’Challenge%26#x002c; be specific and include as much contact information as you can’ type=’textarea’ required=’1’/][/contact-form]