Screen Shot 2013-07-15 at 8.28.07 AMAnd with that shaving cream blast to the face, the Phillies officially headed into the All-Star break at .500, increasing the chances that Ruben Amaro goes for broke and has nothing to show for it at the end of the year.

Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to be wrong, but it’s taken an unlikely surge for the Phils just to climb back to .500. Even then, they’re still without Ryan Howard, Mike Adams, Roy Halladay and Ben Revere for the foreseeable future– four guys who, in April, figured to be important pieces. And Carlos Ruiz is a shell of his former self and, lately, his defense has been very suspect. 

There’s just… not many reasons to believe. But, like children gathering at the culinary teat of a doting soccer mom, we can still enjoy Kevin Frandsen’s post-games pies.

Let’s hit it!

 

But first, a word from our sponsors:

80s. Love these Fleer retro basketball cards at Sports Vault.

Right on. $5 from the sale of each of Philly Phaithful’s Dutch, Heart Soul Hair shirts will go to the American Cancer Society. Get one right here.

Great ticket deals. Very cheap Phillies tickets at Crossing Broad Tickets.

 

The roundup:

DeSean Jackson thinks Obama will right this wrong.

A Moment with Marcus.

Kevin Frandsen’s perfunctory shaving cream pie. And then he went on Twitter and told a fan he was better than them:

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Turns out Kevin is a feisty tweeter, and I like it:

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Did Chip Kelly do something unconventional today? He did: [Philly Mag]

The main practice each day will take place at 12:30 p.m.

“That’s when we play,” Kelly explained. “Twelve or 14 of our 16 games are played at 1 o’clock.”

A reporter jokingly asked Kelly if he’d practice in the evening before night games, but the head coach answered seriously. It was clearly something he had thought about.

“No, because I think it throws your schedule off a little bit to do that just for one day,” he said. “If we were going to play six or seven games consecutively at that time, we would try to change our schedule slightly.”

More details on the start of training camp.

Dude absolutely blowing a Bud aluminum can to kingdom cum.

RGIII may have been texting his mistress the day of his wedding.

Stephen Strasburg got twerked on in Miami. Sort of.

This:

“Gina Carano was an amazing fighter, and she had a fantastic rack,” Rousey said of Carano, later adding, “You don’t see big titties in the Olympics, and I think that’s for a reason.”

Carly Rae Jepsen struggles with first pitch.

Citigroup revenue rose to $20.48 billion. They’ll pay exactly $0 in US taxes.

Miley Cyrus is looking like Justin Timberlake. Her new video is a kind of hot reprise of Fiona Apple’s famed underwear-drug video.

Finally, the new This is SportsCenter commercial with Rickie Fowler is awesome:

http://youtu.be/r56VYh_oB2o