vinny curry

Basketball season is over. Hockey season is over. The Phillies are no fun. All of these facts add up to one of the most fun times of the year: The total grasping at straws and rampant, useless speculations around football season. Do we talk about defensive schemes, or roster moves, or anything we can actually measure? Nope. But it’s a great time of year, and what better way to really dive into it than talk about Vinny Curry’s new diet.

According to CSN, Vinny Curry has cut out red meat, dairy, and gluten, which is to say he can eat none of the things I ate at Outback Steakhouse last night. Sure, he’s getting slimmer (though not dropping pounds), but the real danger probably comes on game day when he’s real hangry and he sees running backs and hallucinates that they’re actually Big Macs. Then, they’re in trouble.

And in other barely worth mentioning news, Vince Young is probably, definitely, most likely retired now.