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Lenny Dykstra and Mitch Williams are both going to be roasted at the Electric Factory on April 23 (tickets available now). And like any roast, Williams and Dykstra will be the butt of the jokes but will have an opportunity to do their own bit. Their individual bits will likely be all about the other guy, and they’ve already started.

First, Angelo Cataldi had Lenny Dykstra on the phone this morning. It went as expected.

Angelo Cataldi: Did you dislike [Mitch] when you were on the team with him?
Lenny Dykstra: The guy became a barrel finder and of course he was extending games … it was painful. But no, I like him. He tried hard. It’s not about like or dislike.

AC: A lot of people thought Fregosi made the wrong move putting Mitch in, what were you thinking?
LD: Well, I just looked in Toronto’s dugout and saw them all sprint to the bat rack.

After taking those (relatively soft) shots at Williams, Dykstra did what Dykstra does. When talking about a book he’s writing about his life, here’s what went down:

LD: Are their things I did that I’m not proud of? Yes. Did I ever break the law? No. What I did was catch some very powerful people breaking the law and … so bottom line is I had to make a decision on this book so I decided at the end of the day the American people deserve the real truth.

AC: How tough was prison?
LD: [Silence]
AC: Oh, we cut Lenny off and now we have to re-get him? Cause Lenny used a word he wasn’t supposed to and we went to hit it and he must have thought we were on satellite radio. Lenny are you there?
LD: Yea, what happened?
AC: You used the “s” word.
LD: [Silence, but from the laughter in the room I assume they edited him saying “shit” again]
AC: So you saw the world from a different perspective is that what this is about?
LD: [Silence]
AC: Oh we lost him again. He repeated the “s” word so it blipped him out.

And then later on they had Mitch Williams on:

Mitch Williams: I only saw what [Lenny] had to say on twitter, and as I said in a previous conversation with you, [the roast] will be the first time I feel like a Harvard grad.

Angelo Cataldi: He said that he’s been wrongly accused, served time in jail and did not do anything illegal, and he said all you did when you pitched was find the barrel of the bat.
MW: I read where he said I was the barrel finder, and if he took the time to research my career stats, I walked more guys than I gave up hits to. I had trouble finding the plate much less the barrel.
AC: We’re worried about Lenny at the roast because he couldn’t even stop himself from using the “s” word for three minutes.
MW: Well, Lenny’s never been accused of being overwhelmed with common sense.

I’d like to imagine they’re saving their best stuff for that roast, and news of Dykstra’s “book” just spawned a bevy of new material.