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– cues Kashmir, cries –

Todd Zolecki:

Chase Utley is on the bench. He is hitting .103 this season and .215 with a .610 OPS in 555 plate appearances since May 29, 2014. Let’s see what Sandberg says in the dugout, but if I’m the manager I tell Utley to take a seat tonight and tomorrow night. There is an off day Thursday, so Utley could have three consecutive days to relax and clear his head. Jeff Francoeur said a weekend off benefited him Monday, when he went 4-for-5.

We’ve now reached the this worked for Francoeur so maybe it’ll work for Utley era of Phillies baseball. Excuse me while I lock myself in a room and watch Chase’s WFC speech on a constant, sad loop.

Fun fact: That lineup image came from the Phillies’ private media Twitter account (@PhilsMediaInfo), which has to be the most asinine thing in existence. Like, they posted the lineup to media members exclusively, and not to fans, in 2015. Amazeballs.

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I’d suggest going ahead and requesting to follow it just to fuck with them. I do it a couple of times each season (always denied), and it’s become sort of a pastime of mine, in the absence of having a real baseball team to root for.