This video is everywhere today. Not gonna lie, by the end of it I was rooting for the bears to destroy the entire yard because of the family’s misplaced priorities over their cheap pool toys and swing set and because of their seeming complete lack of concern over the fact that their yard, which serves as a safe haven for at least several kids and dogs, has become a resort town for a family of POTENTIALLY DEADLY BEARS!

Few things:

– The kid is positively freaking out about her floaty. Understandable. Floaties are great. But still, the fact that she’s so concerned about it is endearing. The frivolous priorities of youth!

– Her freakout at 4:30 when one of the bears sets it sights on said floaty. That’s gonna leave a scar for years.

– The father who is so goddamned concerned about the cheap, $200 pool and not the fact that, again, THOSE BEARS COULD HAVE EATEN HIS CHILDREN! “They’re going to rip the bottom!” Who gives a shit, bro?! Just be thankful everyone is inside and not A BEAR SNACK!!! Maybe it’s time to move to somewhere where there’s not the potential for, you know, BEARS.

– Negative dad points when he informs the daughter – who just watched her floaty, pool and swing set get ruined by bears – that he’s probably not going to buy her a new pool. He should take a part-time job before ever even considering that nuclear option. Appropriate response: “Don’t worry– we’re going to get a bigger, better, BEAR-PROOF pool when we move somewhere far, far away, from bears!”

– And he’ll have the money to move and pay for the years of therapy his daughter will need– the media vultures are all over the YouTube comments requesting permission to use the video. Make them pay for that shit, Holmes. Buy your daughter an in-ground pool, with a fence, to keep out the, you guessed it, BEARS!

– So mad the bears didn’t discover the trampoline. So mad.

– 9:26: “I don’t like these bears!”

– Um, so did this all go very badly at the end?