This sets up well for a redemption tale. My money is on Matt Lauer or, sleeper, Tom Rinaldi as a special correspondent for 60 Minutes to land the redemption story.

Let’s hit it!

 

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The roundup:

Tiger Woods was arrested for DUI. Here’s Jillian Mele talking about it:

 

Mike Trout will undergo surgery on his strained left thumb and will miss 6-8 weeks. I can’t think of a better time for the Angels to trade him to the Phillies. Why wouldn’t they? He’s all washed up and his career is in jeopardy. Let us take on that burden.

 

In other future Phillie news:

I can’t tell if people are ragging on Harper or genuinely respect his gumption. I, for one, love it. It seems like maybe he thought better of that helmet toss mid-throw, and you can’t knock a baseball player for not knowing how to fight. I’ll take this guy on my team any day. I’m convinced half the Phils would’ve just smiled and said to the pitcher, “Ah, you got me!”

 

Donald Trump’s communications director, Mike Dubke, is leaving the White House. It’s always a good sign when the person tasked with making you look good by conveying your message of peace and prosperity to the masses resigns after less than one trimester.

 

Ariana Grande sent out this Tweet at 2 p.m. on Friday expressing her condolences to her fans and announcing a benefit concert to be held in Manchester:

https://twitter.com/ArianaGrande/status/868164986887176192

Allow me to be the cynical pragmatist here for just one second: Lost in the rightful mourning of the victims and outrage over terror is, for Ariana, the fact that her career will forever be linked to a terror attack through absolutely no fault of her own. Unlike The Eagles of Death Metal, who were performing during the attack at the Bataclan Theater in Paris, Ariana at least already has mainstream success and the mention of her name can elicit some response other than simply “yeah, the singer from the terrorist attack.” But, it’s good for no one’s career to be tied to something as heinous as what happened last week. So make no mistake, highly paid PR people are currently figuring out the best way for Ariana to thread the needle by giving the victims and their families the respect they deserve while also making sure her career is not defined by this. Which brings us back to this Tweet, which went out at precisely 2 p.m. on the Friday before a summer holiday weekend, the exact time publicists and image crafters put out news they don’t want getting too much attention. That feels like it was very intentional lest Ariana come to be defined by an event completely outside her control.

 

Nolan Carroll was also arrested for DUI.

 

Frank DeFord died. Naturally, Les Bowen used it as a chance to take a swipe at a new generation of sports writers:

 

This is maybe the single dumbest take I have ever seen:

 

The Phanatic’s wedding appearances are so much better than Mr. Mets’.

 

Done:

 

Gonzo has gone full left coast:

 

Sarah Baicker doing that content thing for the Devils:

I want the Devils to take Nolan Patrick. I’ll have some Nico.

 

I miss Lavs so much:

 

Here’s David Murphy on why the rebuild is taking so long:

Since 2012, the only Phillies draft picks to appear in the majors are Andrew Knapp and Aaron Nola. Besides Nola, only one other first-round pick has suited up for the Phillies in the majors since they drafted Cole Hamels in 2002. That was Joe Savery, the 2007 first-rounder who eventually pitched in 41 games in relief over 2011-13. Besides Nola, the only Phillies first-rounder who has had a modicum of major league success during that stretch is Travis d’Arnaud, who has yet to log 400 plate appearances in a season for the Mets.

Compare that to the Red Sox, who over the last three years have gotten 4,177 plate appearances and a .294/.352/.471 batting line out of Xander Bogaerts, Mookie Betts and Bradley, all three of whom joined the Red Sox system from 2009-11. Part of that was a scouting failure, which is why longtime Phillies scouting director Marti Wolever was shown the door in September 2014, but it was also attributable to a lack of macro-level planning with regard to amateur inventory levels.

He concludes that the Phillies need to restock their draft inventory. Fair. But I don’t think anyone, at least not recently, expected the Phillies to contend just yet. What we did expect, however, was some level of competitiveness from a team with the means to buy themselves into it. Unlike the NBA, you don’t need to bottom out in baseball to rebuild. Given the uncertainty with prospects, the eighth pick in the draft may very well not differ at all from the 22nd pick. Worse, promising young players like Maikel Franco, Odubel Herrera and Vince Velasquez have shown no improvement and have in some cases regressed. The pitching staff in general is embarrassing. And the catcher is so clueless that he has to wear a wristband to remind him of hitters’ tendencies:

The Phillies talked about using a wristband last year, but it took until this weekend’s series to implement it. But before Rupp wore it, the Phillies had to figure out what to put on it. They wanted to put enough information on the wristband to be helpful, but not cram too much information on it that it becomes impossible to use.

The wristband has hot and cold zones for hitters. It tells catchers how to pitch hitters with two strikes. It tells them a hitter’s swing percentage in certain situations.

It is color coded to make it easy to reference. Phillies manager Pete Mackanin said red means no and green means yes.

This goes back to Leslie Gudel writing about many catchers not calling games in college and lacking the ability to do so at the big league level.

Anyway, the ire right now isn’t for a lack of a division leader– it’s for a lack of any semblance of competitive baseball.

That said, this is a really dumb Odubel take:

That’s almost nothing for a 25-year-old with some upside. Never mind the club options after the contract gets pricey.

 

I had a South Philly Dog at the ballpark over the weekend and could not have been more disappointed in my favorite item. The rabe was bland, lacking garlic, and tasted like it had sat in a steaming tray since last Thursday:

Perhaps worse was the roll-to-dog ratio:

It’s really disappointing to see such a quality item not receive the care and attention it deserves.

 

Bill Simmons is moving The Ringer over to Vox Media (The Verge, SB Nation). They won’t own his site, but they’ll be his host and sell advertising on his behalf. Huh. Interesting model.

 

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