the audio corrects itself about 30 seconds in

Jeffrey Lurie decided to hold an impromptu press conference today to the sheer unadulterated delight of the assembled media. He kicked things off by full-on doubling-down on the job Howie Roseman has done. Like, aggressively so. The beginning of this video is a full on fellation of Howie. Bold for a guy who went 7-9 last year and whose new acquisitions haven’t yet stepped on the field this year. If the Eagles flame out – like they did when Howie built the Dream Team – Lurie is going to look foolish. This wasn’t an endorsement of Howie– it was a flat-out stamp of approval on his ability as a GM.

Lurie was asked about Mike Lombardi’s comments about Doug Pederson and, impressively, called them “clickbait” and “hot takes,” two phrases which I’m surprised to find out Lurie knows.

Other items of note:

Colin Kaepernick came up. Lurie sidestepped a few questions, but compared the evaluation process of a guy like Kaepernick to signing Michael Vick (he then mentioned they do this with all players). That seems like a bit of a reach given the fact that Vick was an ex-con and Kaepernick… is not. Pressed on it later, Lurie ad an odd quote: “I don’t think anyone protesting the National Anthem in and of itself is very respectful… but I think we can sometimes misinterpret what those are.” My read on this was that we can misinterpret players kneeling as a protest of the anthem and not as them using a platform to protest something else. He cited Malcolm Jenkins and the work he does in the community. It’s a good point, but Lurie gave far from a ringing endorsement of Kaepernick, and as (@ac_phila) pointed out, Lurie may be the most liberal owner in the league.

Lurie mentioned that he gets briefed on the upcoming games by coaches, but swore that they don’t let him in on the game plan. He then went on to explain what sounded exactly like being let in on the game plan, including giving some hints on the upcoming game plan against the Redskins to attack their new defensive coordinator.

There was this:

Funny. Pederson got some of those decisions unequivocally wrong last year. In fact, here he is last November explaining his decision to twice go for it on fourth down, on the road, in makable field goal situations against the Giants:

“I still feel strong about those. I think the decisions to go for it shows confidence and belief in the guys. At that time I felt like we were moving the ball, and again at the end of the day when you look at it we had more opportunities in this game, to me in my opinion, it didn’t come down to those two plays. There were enough things in this game again that cost us this football game. I still stick by what I did and how I chose to go for it in those situations.”

Math or instinct?

Oh, and how about that time he PUNTED on fourth down up seven – SEVEN – against the Cowboys when a field goal would’ve iced the game that they eventually lost? Pederson literally said he kicked based on feel. I feel like math would’ve dictated trying the 53-year-old field goal to win the fucking game.

OK, I can’t take any more. But Doug Pederson, THE MAN WHO BROUGHT YOU AN EIGHT-MINUTE DRIVE THAT HINGED ON HIS TEAM RECOVERING AN ONSIDE KICK AGAINST THE PATRIOTS, is not making his big decisions based on math.

Lurie says he wants to go back to Kelly Green, but can’t until the league allows them to use different helmets. The issue here is that the league – for ostensible safety reasons – doesn’t want players wearing different helmets throughout the course of the season and therefore the Eagles can’t paint helmets for one week. Lurie carefully worded this, because, despite popular opinion, he doesn’t not want to go back to Kelly Green full-time. Midnight is his color, dammit! He said he’s never selling the team, by the way.

And this seems like a good place to wrap:

LET’S GO CHIEFS!