Even when the Eagles aren’t playing, they’re still winning.

The NFC East completed the trifecta this weekend, going 0-3 and doing it in style. The Cowboys looked like shit, the Redskins disappointed at home, and the Giants looked like the Giants.

At the risk of jinxing it, next Sunday could wrap up the division for the Birds, who travel to Dallas on two weeks of rest. The Eagles are 8-1 and the Cowboys 5-4, so a win in Arlington would create a gap that probably can’t be closed.

1. America’s team

They looked like garbage without Ezekiel Elliott, but it’s almost like they forgot how to play in situations that wouldn’t even involve him anyway.

Left tackle Chaz Green gave up six sacks to Adrian Clayborn, a guy who had 2 sacks and 8 tackles coming into the game. Clayborn said post game that he “only had one move, and it worked.”

Dallas lost 27-7 in Atlanta. Dak Prescott went 20-30 for 176 yards and backup ball carrier Alfred Morris finished with 11 rushes for 53 yards. The Cowboys’ lone score came on an 11-yard Prescott run.

So it’s now officially Dallas week, which kicked off with Cole Beasley jumping on a Howard Eskin troll job:

2. McAdoo a Better Job

Remember C.J. Beathard? The rookie quarterback who the Eagles trashed a few weeks back?

He went 19-25 for 288 yards and two touchdowns in a 31-21 home win vs. the Giants.

San Francisco improved to 1-9 and the Giants fell to 1-8, so this really was a marquee matchup between NFL contenders.

New York is already done with Ben McAdoo:

3. Hail to the Redskins

They lost 38-30 at home to the Vikings.

Washington actually made a late push to pull within a score, but blew their final chance with one of the worst onside kicks I’ve ever seen:

https://twitter.com/recordsANDradio/status/929819851799003137

But let’s talk about the Minnesota Vikings, who are now 7-2 and alone atop the NFC North. They’re doing it with Case Keenum, Latavius Murray, Jerick McKinnon, and Adam Thielen. No Bridgewater, no Bradford, no Cook. They’ve won five in a row and play the Rams at home next weekend, a game that should have serious implications on postseason home field advantage and seeding. After that, they kick off a three game road trip against Detroit, Atlanta, and Carolina, so I think we see Minnesota come down to Earth going into December.

4. New Orleans

They’re for real. They’re the biggest threat to the Eagles in the NFC, and I don’t know if the Birds survive a trip to Louisiana. If these teams meet in the postseason, it’s gotta be at the Linc.

The Saints demolished Buffalo in Buffalo yesterday and it wasn’t even close. They put up 482 yards of offense against a pretty good defensive unit and controlled the clock for more than 41 minutes. That’s a ridiculous number.

Part of the reason they did is because their run game is firing on all cylinders right now:

A football purist should enjoy a matchup between the Saints’ running game and the Eagles’ run defense. New Orleans is a balanced squad that looks unbeatable right now.

5. Sean McVay, coach of the year?

Not if Doug Pederson has something to say about it.

The Rams look like the real deal as well, with an emphatic 33-7 win against Houston yesterday. Shame nobody is in their stadium to see it.

Anyhow, Jared Goff threw for 355 yards and three touchdowns while Tom Savage looked like Tom Savage on the other squad. They’ve got the Vikings next week and the Saints after that, so we’re gonna learn if this team is for real or not.

Right now, I think I’ve got the NFC ranked something like this:

  • 1A – Eagles
  • 1B – Saints
  • 3 – Rams
  • 4 – Vikings
  • 5 – doesn’t really matter

6. The Cleveland Browns

0-9

DeShone Kizer got hurt. Cody Kessler had to come in for him. They lost again.

https://twitter.com/michaelfazel/status/929819885726830599

7. A Burfict Circle

Bengals linebacker Vontaze Burfict was ejected for making contact with an official in yesterday’s 24-20 loss against the Titans.

Ian Rapoport says he won’t be suspended for this, but might be fined:

Burfict has long been an idiot and dirty player. He was suspended for repeated violations of player safety last year. He was also suspended three games this year after a cheap hit in preseason play. The Bengals rewarded him with a three-year extension worth $38 million.

The linebacker walked off the field just how you’d expect him to:

8. Doing what they do

Ho hum, the Patriots won again. Denver looked awful.

I don’t know who beats New England in the playoffs. Is Pittsburgh good enough? Kansas City feels like a different team, and I don’t trust Andy Reid in the postseason. I’m also skeptical of the AFC South.

Patriots 41, Broncos 16 in Colorado. Brady tossed it around with ease and the Pats got their typically balanced contributions from basically every guy on the roster:

 

9. My fantasy team

You don’t care about it, and neither do I.

It’s a joke:

I’m 1-9 and I deserve to be.

10. Marquise Goodwin

This was the best moment of the weekend:

You see his teammates come over to join him after the score. It’s been a rough year for the NFL in a lot of ways, but every so often you see a shred of humanity out there.