While the Eagles were dropping 51 on the previously top-ranked Denver Broncos defense yesterday, our neighbors to the north, the New York Giants, were getting 51 dropped on them by Jared Goff and the Los Angeles Rams. Listen, I love it when the Giants lose. I’m the first one to talk shit and revel in the sports-related misery of New Yorkers, but after yesterday, I think I might have to give it a rest. The Eagles are so good. They sit atop the NFC, where the air is crisp, while the Giants drown in a New York City puddle of piss, rat excrement and warm trash truck juice. It’s not that I don’t want to kick the Giants or fans of the team while they’re down, it’s more of a “Lions don’t concern themselves with the opinion of sheep” type of thing. I don’t need to bask in the misery of others in order to make myself whole anymore. I’m better than that now.

Wait. No I’m not. It’s like Deion Sanders says, “I tried my best to take the high road, but I don’t know the address to the high road.” How fucking BAD are they? Oh my god! Where do I even begin? Do I begin here?

Grim. The New York media is notoriously unfair. I bet the same Giants fans who were aglow this time last year over a resurgent Eli Manning and a potent offense are willing to take the long view with their head coach, even though he looks like an Omaha Steaks salesman. Let’s go to the polls.

Oh, wow. It looks like 94% percent of the nearly 3,000 respondents at the time of this post are calling for the ouster of Ben McAdoo. You couldn’t get 94 percent of New Yorkers to agree that you need oxygen to breathe. That’s impressive.

Look, Eli Manning is cooked. They have defensive players deliberately trying to get themselves suspended so that they don’t have to suit up and play, and the ones remaining are giving effort like this:

Surely, McAdoo had something to say to his team at halftime as they were in the midst of giving up more points in any game at home since the 1964 season finale against the Cleveland Browns. Whatcha got, Ben?

Laugh out fucking loud. Somebody pinch me.