Parity is alive and well in baseball, as the 87-win Philadelphia Phillies and 89-win San Diego Padres will be SQUARING UP in the NLCS, as the 101-win Braves, 101-win Mets, and 111-win (!) Dodgers can have nothing else to look forward to other than their tee times.

It’s GREAT for baseball that the Phillies and Padres, the #6 and #5 seeded teams in the National League, rode hot streaks into the championship series and saved us all from another Dodgers/Braves NLCS. Fresh blood into an otherwise stale National League.

It’s parity, baby, and for us as Phillies fans it’s vindication, a long time coming for an underperforming early season team that put it all together under a new manager to make the run of a lifetime.

For salty Braves fans? It’s the realization that their 101-win season means JACK SHIT and they wasted eight months of their lives following a team filled with players that couldn’t even be bothered to back up a long fly ball to deep center field.

And the sweet irony of it all? Amidst all the Braves whining and belly aching? They forget that JUST LAST YEAR their team won the World Series after winning 88 games, ousting the 95-win Brewers and 106-win Dodgers along the way. Did they complain then that an “inferior” team defeated two juggernauts in the National League playoffs and then dispatched the 95-win Astros?

They did not.

It’s gotta be hard! I get it, your team was just embarrassed by a scrappy NL East rival that only won 87 games this season! Just look at these crybabies! Their tears will sustain us for the Phillies hopeful run into the World Series, or at the very least give us a good chuckle before the Eagles welcome the Cowboys to the Linc tonight for a Sunday Night Football slugfest.

Just look at some of these losers:

Yes, somehow the teams that get a five-day bye are MORE taxed than the teams that had to waste their aces playing an additional playoff series. We all knew the Phillies would have a massive tactical advantage heading into game 1 of the NLDS having to throw #3 starter Ranger Suarez against Braves ace Max Fried. DAMN YOU, ROB MANFRED, WHY HAST THOU FORSAKEN US?!

Blaming the start time of a game is a new one… or having to play a game on the weekday. He does make a good point though, the Braves played very few weekday games over the course of the 162-game season:

Easily my favorite excuse. But, but the Braves didn’t get to play any games on the weekend?! WHAT IS THIS EXCUSE? Did the Braves not have to play any weekday games during the regular season? Is his point that home games are filled with more people on the weekend, rather than the weekday? Let’s be honest, Mr. Garlic, the Braves crowd would be tepid and uninspiring on the weekend as well.

Easily the biggest loser energy I’ve seen on social media from a Braves fan, and that’s saying a lot:

Again, what is it with the day game excuse? Are you really reaching this hard to find something to latch onto? Did the Braves have ocular problems we didn’t know about? Too sunny out? It’s not like the Braves had to take their at bats during the day and the Phillies played at night. Get over it.

Had to include a Mets fan in this mess for the fun of it. Oh Erik. You sweet, sweet boy. The current playoff system gives teams with the best records a BYE in the playoffs, one less series to have to play in… the very definition of “rewarding greatness.”

I also find it ironic that Erik touts himself as a motivational speaker in his twitter bio and defines his work as such:

“Erik entertains audiences with motivational stories about pro athletes overcoming adversity.”

Pro athletes overcoming adversity? Like…an 87-win Wild Card team boat racing a 101-win juggernaut out of the playoffs?

Just a piece of advice for you, Erik. Forget about the Mets. They’ll put you into an early grave:

Ahh, the “unclassy” excuse. I’ll admit it, I’ve been there! I have! Another team shows up your hometown squad, you need to lash out at something, so you focus on one player and deem them to be low class.

WHY DOESN’T HE ACT LIKE HE’S BEEN THERE BEFORE? Well brother, if you watched Rhys this entire playoff run you’d know he’s never been there before:

WAHHHHHH WAHHHHHH MY BRAVES WERE ACTUALLY HURT BY HAVING A BYE WAHHHHHHH.

Oh my GOD this is so pathetic. I just, I can’t anymore. Have some respect for yourself. Having a bye is not a disadvantage. You line up your starters just right, your bullpen is nice and rested…and you just hope you don’t completely get embarrassed in the series like a certain team from Atlanta did. It happens! Get over it!

Oh well! I’ll leave you with this, gang, a true encapsulation of every single whiney, God-awful Braves fans that popped into your mentions or your lives during this glorious playoff run. Just think about this fellow anytime they want to talk that nonsense through the rest of the playoffs.

Enjoy: