Roy Halladay’s Bronze Hand is Creepy

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The Roy Halladay perfect game ceremony redux was well done, it really was.  The gifts were nice, watching Chooch get home plate was man-jerking (a male tear jerker), and the presence of Doc's wife and kids made the ceremony heartwarming.  But it was their very presence that led to some mega-creepiness.

David Montgomery presented Hallday’s two young sons with a bronze statue of their father’s hand, inscribed with the words “Dad’s Perfect Pitch.”  I don’t know about you, but I generally find a bronzed anything creepy.  And I don’t think any child wants to have a life-sized, veiny mold of Dad’s hand on their dresser.  I’m pretty sure that's the type of thing leads to serial killers who cut off and eat their victims hands.  But what do I know.

A better use would be to throw a couple double A’s in that son-bitch and you’d have a rather popular novelty item for women in the Delaware Valley- one that would eventually have its own Howard Stern segment.

Make it happen.  We’ll call it, “Playing Doctor.”


Oh jeez, there's a whole culture devoted to these things.


8 Responses

  1. We saw that yesterday and immediately had images of the kids in the backseat of the SUV on the way home saying ‘the CLAW! the CLAW!’

  2. Hmm? I thought that I was the only one that found that mold a little creepy. Guess not. Interesting idea on an alternate idea for the hand mold though. I had to read it twice before I realized what you meant then I laughed and laughed. How vulgar! LOL

  3. “I ran into him in the park where the boy found the severed hand….” Gob Bluth

  4. And if they are like we were when we were kids, those baseballs will be very well used!

  5. When I saw those, I thought “wow, great gift – those kids will really appreciate that…in like, 30 years.”

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