BREAKING NEWS ZOMG! Philly Sports Fans No Longer Worst People on Earth
Finally… finally, somebody outside of Philadelphia acknowledged that we're not the worst people on earth. The national media has come around, yo! Er, well, at least Matt "Money" Smith of FOX Sports West has. Shit, a guy with the self-proclaimed moniker "Money." Surely Michael Wilbon is next.
Last weekend's parking lot brawl at the UCLA – USC game put Currency over the edge:
As I near my 20-year mark in L.A., I am more than comfortable saying to hell with Philadelphia, there's not a worse set of fans in the country than right here in Los Angeles.
The buildup has been gathering for years, from the Raiders' days at the Coliseum, through the near-riots that ensued after the Lakers' championships in this decade, to last weekend's parking-lot brawl at the Rose Bowl, where Arturo Cisneros (a 44-year-old man, by the way) was arrested on suspicion of attempted murder thanks to his alleged stabbing of a Cal State Fullerton kid eight times in the back.
Soooo, you're saying we're number two? We always finish second. But hey, in this case, being the first loser is a win for us, no? Well, at least all of those played out cliches have finally subsided.
At this point, no amount of booing Santa Claus is going to wrest that distinction away from the "City of Angels."
Finally, some attention is given to the recent parking lot incidents in LA:
Angelinos even got into the spirit in record time in 2009 after a fan was stabbed multiple times in the parking lot at the Dodgers' home opener.
Eagles fans made a name for themselves booing Santa and cheering opposing players lying injured on the turf, but they can't compare to L.A. when it comes to taking the "action" to the stands, to the parking lots and to the streets.
Eh, we'll take it. Santa deserved it- the Eagles stunk that day, it was cold, and he was a shitty Claus. At least nobody got shanked.
Well done, Philly, we're almost model citizens. Tear.
H/T to Lisa for the article