Will You Buy This New Titanium Bracelet Endorsed by Mike Vick?

Kyle Scott - March 14, 2011

Vick_bracelet

I says "no."

We are about two court proceedings away from seeing NFL players sell their bodies on street corners. Not that Mike Vick is one of the poor ones, but you should fully expect to see more odd endorsements from NFL players, similar to this one from Vick.

According to Darren Rovell, Vick has signed an endorsement deal with Core Synergy, a titanium-infused, silicone wristband.

Titanium

Discovered in the late 1700s, titanium has been a metal known for its strength, durability and compatibility with the human body. Titanium, is used in artificial body parts and jewelry for those with sensitive skin and even in alternative medicine, where the metal has found a new following.

Energy Fields

In alternative medicine, magnetized titanium holds a positive charge and is said to reverse the effect of pain in the body caused by negative energy fields.

Durability

Core Synergy bands combine titanium, in the form of powder, within 100% silicone rubber to create a 100% waterproof and flexible band for the athletically minded.

 

Uh huh.

For years now, baseball players have been wearing these Phiten bracelets and necklaces, which retail for around $30. Now Core Synergy, founded in October, has thrown their trinket into the ring.

Either these things are magic, or they're a hoax. Yeah, I'm going with hoax. Vick's gettin' dat bread tho. Of course, UFC model Arianny Celeste wears them, so maybe it's not the hormones in milk giving girls larger… never mind. Those signs don't hold themselves.

Vick_bracelet_chick

17 Comments

  • Iron Balls McGinty March 14, 2011 at 4:43 pm

    “Of course, UFC model Arianny Celeste wears them, so maybe it’s not the hormones in milk giving girls larger…”
    What about those silicon hormones? They seem to be effective.

    Reply
  • Iron Balls McGinty March 14, 2011 at 4:47 pm

    PS: How come nobody is selling iron bracelets? Dr. Quack says the body needs iron as a staple. So an iron bracelet is good cause you can lick the rust off it. Especially Arianny Celeste’s rust.

    Reply
  • Lead tablets March 14, 2011 at 4:59 pm

    Now selling lead tablets, unlike wristbands these tablets will get to the core of your problems!

    Reply
  • stephen March 14, 2011 at 6:57 pm

    I would twist her up like a pretzel

    Reply
  • jk March 14, 2011 at 9:29 pm

    that idiot should give them out for free for what hes done.

    Reply
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