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Good lookin' out by reader Andrew. As I've said before, there needs to be a screening process for anyone sitting behind home plate (in view of cameras) or appearing as part of Citizens 7. I'll even write the one-page screener. If you answer yes to two or more of these questions, you're out:

Are you drunk?

Do you have a sign which features a commonly accepted name for "semen"? [example]

Did you go to Devon Prep?*

Are you at the game with your girlfriend and do the two of you not have a private place to make a sexual? [example]

Is your name Jordan or Candice?

Ill shirt? (auto DQ)

Are you Jeff Carter? [example]

Do you remember that time Cliff Lee threw his no-hitter?

Are you horny? [example] [example] [example]

Do you have an app that turns emoticons into 2D images?

Did someone give you those seats or is your ticket for elsewhere in the ballpark?

Are you wearing a red fist? [example]

*Required, I went to Malvern

See how easy that was? You're welcome, Phillies.