Jonathan Papelbon Deal Official, Will Get Extra $58 Just to Prove How Incredibly Douchey Closers Can Be

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Jonathan Papelbon passed his physical. The Phillies will introduce Paps (?) at a 5 PM press conference today. Perhaps most (or least) interesting is that the deal is officially for four years, $50,000,058. 

Yep, an extra 58 bucks… just like his number, which will be surrendered by Antonio Bastardo.

The deal has a vesting option for a fifth year, which would pay Paps an extra $13 million if he finishes 55 games in 2015 or a total of 100 games in 2014 and 2015.

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30 Responses

  1. Is it safe to say that he is being looked at as the Phillies’ version of Kris Versteeg? I just hope he can do much more for the Phils than Versteeg did for the boys.

  2. I hate him already. He better be the fucking man on the field or people are gonna go ape shit over this contract come next offseason.

  3. Terrible fucking signing.
    $50 mil for a closer??? We’re officially becoming the yankees. I don’t give a shit if he’s Mariano fucking Rivera. No closer deserves that much cash – especially if he’s as shaky as Pap Smear has been the past 2 years.

  4. Fastest closer in history to 200 saves and this is a bad thing?? Before his contract year, Madson was a train wreck as a closer. Negadelphia back in full swing.

  5. @Jose-couldn’t agree more, the guy has 200 less ip than Madson, younger and he has more closing experience and quite frankly if madson wanted more than 50 mil 5 years negadelphia would have been bitchin louder about that deal.

  6. Kyle in order to “squarely focus our attention on the flyers”, we need some fucking coverage, they won last night, bryz played well, playin tonight…Hello?

  7. Everyone will have his nuts on their chins when he’s saving our asses in 2-1 games thanks to this shit ass aging lineup that cant hit that we are going to send out there next year.

  8. everyone chill on the salary. 1. teh phillies can afford anyone now, get used to it. 2. its teh same annual salary as lidge, 12+ mill
    STFU everyone

  9. @jow – “Everyone will have his nuts on their chins when he’s saving our asses in 2-1 games thanks to this shit ass aging lineup that cant hit that we are going to send out there next year.”

  10. I seriously dont get why people hate this signing. Look at his numbers from last year. 31/34 in save opportunities, 2.94, 0.93 WHIP (for those of you who dont know what that is, it means on average he allowed less than 1 runner on base per inning. Madson’s was over 1). People who say he is washed up are nuts. People remember the blown save against the orioles to end the season and assume he sucked dick all year. Wrong. A. that was his only blown save in the 9th inning all year and B. Crawford shoulda caught that ball and normally would 9/10 times. Try looking at stats before hopping on the hatewagon.

  11. WOW they made bastardo give up 58? Thats douchier than adding the extra $58 onto the salary. what the shit is happening.

  12. @chicarito – I dont think anyone is concerned about the rotation, its more so the lineup that can’t hit.
    I dont care how good Doc, Cliff and Cole are this year, they cant shut everyone out. If they give up 1, 2, or 3 a game…the closer might be more important than we think.

  13. bastardo shouldn’t give his number up. he should say “fuck you, i was here first.” 58 isnt even a cool number, why does he like it so much?

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