Joe Amendola’s reality-distortion field was on full display today. He met with reporters after client number one Jerry Sandusky made his trial-football analogy, as seen above.
Between the freezing cold and his Herbert-from-Family-Guy Ss, Amendola sounded like a molesty version of Clark Griswold giving his Griswold Family Christmas Tree speech at the beginning of the National Lampoon’s classic.
Among the things the attention-loving lawyer said:
– First, that he doesn’t love attention. Amendola explained when giving his client this vote of confidence: “If Sandusky walked into my office on November 5, I probably wouldn’t have wanted to handle the case.”
Translation: We have no shot and this is going to ruin my career. I thought this would all go away, the way other accusations against Penn State football folks have in the past.
Amendola was intimating that he’d prefer spending time with the clients at his small practice, rather than taking on the country’s biggest court case.
– Joey spent most of the session – sans jacket – trying to charm the media, talking about how cold it was and how he was going to “borrow a coat.” At times, he walked away from the podium so he could better hear and share questions with the assembled media. A real showman, he is.
– At one point he tried to “sell” his client to the nation. A chopped up quote: “I think as people get to know Jerry Sandusky… they’ll get to know he takes time answering questions… pauses before answer.”
Yeah, that’s because he’s probably guilty.
– Amendola admitted Sandusky gives “awkward” answers, and that he could be naive. The lawyer admitted that his client – soon to be on trial for raping children – hugged and kissed his victims, actions that Amendola explained away by saying he himself was from a family where men would kiss and relatives would “pat him on the butt.”
Yes, Joe, so do baseball coaches, but they rarely rape their setup men following the game.
– Amendola admitted he was presenting an “unorthodox defense” by having Sandusky give interviews to the New York Times and – “I’ll give NBC a little plug here," he said – Rock Center.
– Amdendola called into question the credibility of Mike McQueary, and the grand jury presentment, because, he says, it’s basically a report written by the prosecution and signed by the grand jury. He was intimating that some of the victims were in it for money.
– Finally, when speaking about McQueary, Amendola said “[If you believe McQueary], I suggest you dial 1-800-Reality.” Deadspin did, and it turns out that is a gay porn hotline [audio here]. Irrrony.
Edited video of Sandusky, Amendola and other attorneys, after the jump. StateCollege.com has the full press conference.
I wonder if Big Scott Paterno was there
this lawyer reminds me of barry zuckerkorn.
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