This is almost exactly like that scene in Major League II where Roger Dorn got so broke that he started selling proctology ads all over the outfield walls of his stadium. But in this case, the Mets muffed that model and are trying to sell the actual ads.
This bid of tid comes to us from Andrew Marchand of ESPN New York [via Deadspin] who tells us about the Mets’ official auction, which itself is not anything out of the ordinary, but contains items that are, um, peculiar.
Like ads from the outfield walls at Citi Field.
You see, in an effort to improve power numbers, the Mets are moving in the fences this year. And why should you let the old panels go to waste when you can sell them?!!
That’s right, folks, the Mets are auctioning off panels from sections of the fence that were adorned with advertisements and championship banners. Our eye is drawn to one section in particular: the Wheat Thins: The Crunch is Calling advertisement, which used to call Utley’s Corner home (!!!). And yes, the Mets even got the description wrong by saying the panels were located in left field. They weren't– they were in right.
*SHIPPING IS NOT INCLUDED IN PRICE*WINNER MUST CONTACT AMAZIN' MEMORABILIA TO ARRANGE FREE PICKUP OR DISCUSS COSTS OF DELIVERY*
These 7 panels featuring the Wheat Thins logo were located in the left field at Citi Field until the end of the 2011 season. Each panel is approximately 4X8? and weigh about 75 pounds. FJ631780 – FJ631781 – FJ631782 – FJ631783 – FJ631784 – FJ631785 – FJ631786 Please contact Mets Amazin? Memorabilia to discuss shipping/pickup details. You may pick up the panels at Citi Field during regular business hours at no additional cost. Don?t miss the opportunity to own this unique piece of Mets memorabilia. The availability of items varies, but for questions about this piece or different numbers, players, colors, or sizes please contact Amazin' Memorabilia, The Official Source for New York Mets Game Used Memorabilia, by emailing firstname.lastname@example.org or by calling 718-559-3144. An MLB Authentication Program tamperproof hologram is affixed to each piece of Amazin' Memorabilia. For more information on this item, visit http://mlb.mlb.com/mlb/authentication/ and enter the hologram listed above.
Thank God for that authentic hologram, because you don’t want to be fooled by the many counterfeit 4-foot-by-8-foot cushioned Wheat Thins panels floating around NYC. – pauses – Actually… Mets ownership is known to be involved with the sale of worthless goods, so perhaps the hologram is a good thing.
The bidding for the panels opens at $1,000, and as you may have guessed, there are no bidders yet– which means that I’m very seriously considering splurging on or asking for your help in purchasing Utley’s Corner for exhibit at every. single. tailgate. for. all. eternity. I’ll bring all seven panels, and we can take turns hitting whiffle balls over the wall which we will then sprinkle with a 50-50 organic blend of beer and excellence.
Really, I’m thinking about buying this.
There are other sections of fence available in the auction, too. They include ones used for a Lincoln ad, a Delta ad, a Verizon ad, and assorted championship banners that I really don’t care about.
Ladies and gentlemen, your 2012 Mets: for when you can’t afford a punchline.
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