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This is the how every one of Ed Wade’s recurring nightmares starts out– with Ruben Amaro ringing his doorbell before robbing him of all his worldly possessions.

Earlier today, Amaro, his tinted sunglasses, and swinging-dick stopped by the home of Raymond and Adele DiCrescenzo to hand deliver their 2012 Phillies season tickets (!!!). Rube brought with him the box of tickets, a jersey, the Phillie Phanatic… and a throng of media, which included Jennaphr Frederick carrying both the FOX and CBS mics (we saw that, Jenn). 

Rube quickly tired of the smalltalk after a few moments of pleasantries and deferred to the more extroverted Phanatic. But, just after cameras shut off, the GM returned to the house, ransacked the DiCrescenzo’s refrigerator, and borrowed Adele for a few moments. All Raymond was left with were the tickets, the jersey, and three players-to-be-named-later.

Video after the jump.

Reals: Raymond was the man who was hit by a car outside CBP last year, so this one just warms the heart on this Valentine's Day. Ruben did not ransack his fridge nor steal his wife. That was hyperbole. We think.

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