Morning Wood: Slip It In, Coach!

Wait, did I get that lyric right in the headline, or no? WHO CARES?! It’s Opening Day and, more importantly, your morning wood is back and harder than ever!

For over five months you have awoken sans Wood. A long, flaccid(?) winter it was. But fear you shant– we’re in for six (SEVEN?!) months of baseball, cold beers, hot dogs, Crab Fries, random healthy ballpark choices like paninis, Wheels…, Safe and Secure with New York Life, Aces, Jimmy Rollins’ lack of plate discipline, summer nights at the shore with T-Mac screaming in our ears, and, yes, Morning Wood. Every day, it’s there, whether you like or not. I like it and you should too. Let’s Wood.

The Phillies kick things off today from the Shit City at 1:35 p.m. on MyPHL17. TOM MCCARTHY WILL BRING YOU THE ACTION FROM A BEAUTIFUL… BUT A BIT CHILLY… PNC PARK IN PITTSBURGH. WHEELS?

Today's lineup: Victorino CF, Polanco 3B, Rollins SS, Pence RF, Wigginton 1B, Mayberry LF, Ruiz C, Galvis 2B, Halladay P.

Here are your splinters. Careful, they’re prickly:

– Without a doubt, my favorite season preview comes from, who used the Harry Doyle Theory in examining the Phillies’ first at-bats of the season: 


At-Bat: Line drive double. Everyone is happy and pumped up.

Season: World Series champions. Everyone is happy and pumped up.

Correlation:  1.0


It turns out that there is little correlation between the first at-bat of the season and  postseason success… but who doesn’t want to see a list of J-Roll’s™ s season-leadoff accomplishments?

– Well played, dying papers of record:

Screen Shot 2012-04-05 at 8.50.09 AM

Of course, most of their season preview is a mess of clichéd lineup spot previews and other cookie cutter fare– Still a Mound of Talent, Polanco Ready to Go, Ruiz’s Health is Critical. Lordy, I was waiting for the Phillies Must Advance Runners Over The Plate to Win headline. Here are two that are worth a read, though. Oddly, both are written by Bob Brookover.

Phillies are invested in Freddy Galvis

Will newcomers step up? 

– Phillies Nation has your early season storylines. We're also happy to announce a partnership with Phillies Nation and Drinker's Philadelphia. Next Wednesday, April 11, we'll be hosting our first joint game watch at Drinker's West (39th and Market). Look for details later today.

– John Gonzalez on Mayberry or Pierre?

– The Mets are are running a BOGO on tickets for Opening Day, which is “closing in on a sellout": [NY Post

The Mets sent more emails yesterday, cutting ticket prices to today’s game by between $4 and $22, depending on the seat.

The Mets spun the Opening Day, two-for-one offer as a bid to get families out to Citi Field this weekend.

“Sales are going well … closing in on a sellout for [Opening Day],” said Mets VP David Howard.

But fan Raymond Intriago of Brooklyn, who’s attending today’s game despite his bleak view of the Mets’ prospects, said, “There’s no real reason to go.’’


– Philly Mag’s Mike Bertha – my fantasy baseball co-owner of team Berthing Scott – was there when Cliff Lee picked up fans on a golf cart Monday.

– Finally, videos of Phillies players surprising fans during the On Deck Series and the team’s sendoff can be viewed after the jump. 



4 Responses

  1. Ahh, baseball! At last! At long last! I’m so excited for the new season! I’m sure it’s going to be one hell of a rollercoaster ride for both the Phillies and us, the fans. PLAY BALL!!!

  2. I can not wait to leave work early & get f*cked while watching the phils this afternoon

  3. It would be great if they signed Cole today. Get it done Rube

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