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Phoebe Phanatic was in town yesterday for Mother’s Day and she celebrated by giving us all a peek up her skirt. I wonder how the feminist zealots will feel about this screen cap from reader MikeWhat if someone took a picture of your mascot’s underwear and blasted it all over the interwebtuals, how would you feel? What, are furry green mascots nothing more than a piece of meat to you? Grow up and act like you’ve seen a Phanatic's pussy before. 

Those are the reactions I would expect.

It’s May 14. The Phillies are in last place, the Flyers are golfing, the Sixers are trailing the Celtics 1-0 in the second round, Mike Richards and Jeff Carter appear like they may not lose a game again this season, and Jay-Z is going to announce a hip hop and latin music festival in Philadelphia this morning.

Welcome to bizarro Philadelphia. Let’s hit it.


 

But first, a word from our sponsors:

– Join us Thursday night at Drinker’s Tavern in Old City (2nd and Market) for Philly Sports in Movies quizzo. From Rocky to Goldberg the Goalie, we’ll test your Philly sports and movie knowledge. 8 p.m. More details here.

– Check out BC Sports for all your Philly sports apparel needs. Get gear, memorabilia and signed photos. Shop here.

– Get Philly Phaithful’s Beat Boston t-shirt to show your love all over your chest.

– Tickets for the Phils-Astros series begin at $12. Sixers-Celtics tickets starting at $41 on Crossing Broad Tickets.

 

The roundup:

– Osi Umenyiora and his impossible name took an incredibly cheap shot in their ongoing Twitter war with LeSean McCoy yesterday:

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If you’ll recall, last June Umenyioairairoameniemynyoira responded to a Tweet from McCoy which called the Giant soft by telling NJ.com that McCoy shouldn’t be “no Twitter gangsta.” Ironnnny.

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– From the impossible to script department: Douchebag Bryce Harper broke his bat in frustration on Friday. The bat bounced off a wall and hit Harper in the face, forcing him to get 10 stitches:

"It's just a little frustration," said Harper, whose hair was still blood-stained as he spoke with reporters at his locker. "It doesn't hurt at all. I feel fine. I didn't get light-headed."

 

Hate him yet? 

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– DeSean Jackson was pulled over and given what looks to be a field sobriety test on Saturday morning while on his way to a charity event at a church in Philadelphia. Witnesses tell TMZ that an officer was very rough toward D-Jac, but was never given any attitude by the Eagles wide receiver. Details are fuzzy here and the whole situation is odd. One reader emailed us (before the TMZ story was posted), and said that his friends witnessed the scene, which they said occurred on Penrose Ave.

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– Last night on NBC 10’s Sports Final, Howard Eskin reported that Cole Hamels and his agent are looking for a seven-year deal.

– The Mets may offer David Wright a long-term deal.

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Photos from Eagles cheerleader auditions.

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– Mike Richards and Jeff Carter, who are up 1-0 in the Western Conference Finals, were seated courtside at the Clippers game on Friday night. via readers Mike and Joe

– This morning, Jay-Z will announce a hip hop and latin music festival to take place in Fairmount Park over Labor Day weekend. I don’t see what could possibly go wrong here.

– 90 years ago today the Phillies dipped below the .500 mark and have never gone back over it.

– Joe Biden's room was filled with Phillies posters on Saturday Night Live:

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– Manchester City won the English Premier League in RIDICULOUS fashion yesterday, scoring two goals in extra time to win the title