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What The F&#$ are the Union Doing?

By Kyle Scott

Published: Jun 6th, 2012 · 3:46 PM EDT

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I has no idea!

Look, I don’t pretend to be an expert on the Union (or soccer), but I can tell you that, from afar, it looks like the Union have no idea what they fuck they are doing.

As detailed here, head coach Peter Nowak seems like a real asshole, partly because of the way he (and the team) handled the Sebastien Le Toux trade. 

Now comes word – as first broken by Delco Times beat writer Chris Vito – that the Union have traded the only other recognizable player on the team, Danny Mwanga, to the Portland Timbers for Jorge Perlaza, whose name I read as George Plaza. 

Judging by the immediate reaction of fans on Twitter, the move seems like a win for the TIMMMMBERRRRS!

Union fans:

 

Timbers fans: 

There are obviously opinions on both sides of the fence… but those seem to be the prevaling sentiments.

The Union’s logic: Trade our best, most recognizable and well-liked players after we establish ourselves in a tough market and become competitive more quickly than anyone could have imagined.

Smart, you guys.

Some speculate that the Union may be freeing up money to sign a big name, aging European star, such as Didier Drogba, who was essentially the Premier League’s version of Jimmy Rollins (both in appearance and career-standing), a former star on the backside of his career with an older team. Of course, Drogba scored the game-tying and winning goals in the Champions League final this year, so he still has something left. By coming to the MLS, he could follow in the footsteps of Thierry Henry, who plays for the New York Red Bulls, but reports have Drogba going to China.

A European star, like Drogba, coming here, however, is a long shot and probably a pipe dream, at best. So the question remains: What the fuck are the Union doing?