Screen Shot 2012-09-21 at 3.15.04 PM"I get it. The same way I put my quarter of blackness in 7,000 women? Nice!"

It’s been a few hours since Charles Barkley last said something hilarious. So, he was due.

Asked about Tiger Wood’s somewhat indifferent reaction to Greg Norman’s comments that Tiger was intimidated by Rory McIlroy – Woods jokingly responded by calling Rory The Intimidator – Barkley had this to say on a Chicago sports talk radio station: [the full quote, for your humorical pleasure]

“I got to tell you something, I’m disappointed in Tiger. You know, how long is he going to let anyone say anything about him? Like, I would like for him to just blast Greg Norman. He saw all the stuff he’s been through these last few years, he’s got to realize– like dude, these people really don’t like you even though you made them a gazillion dollars. That situation gave everybody a chance to dump on you, and he still tries to take the high road. You know, I’m not a high road guy. I wanted him to come out and really blast Greg Norman. Like dude, what the hell are you talking about? I got a lot more victories than you. I got a ton more majors than you.

I don’t understand why he just lets people treat him any type of way. I really don’t. I wish he would just go ballistic on Greg Norman. You can’t just let people say anything to you about you when you’re minding your own business. Tiger’s always taking the high road, so everybody dumps on him about the marriage stuff. He’s been struggling for the last few years. Everybody’s been dumping on him. Now he’s having a terrific year. He’s won three times, he’s having a great year. Obviously he didn’t win a major, I’m very cognizant of that. But like, you just can’t say anything about that kid you want to. I wish I could just put some of my blackness in him. 

That means, like, hey man… toughness. And I’m not talking about that mental golf toughness. Like, hey man, you can’t just say anything to me. 

Like, when I got arrested eight times for fighting, I was like dude, just cause I’m Charles Barkley you can’t disrespect me anyway, and I have slapped the hell out of fans before. Listen, I’m gonna respect the fans, and 90% of the fans are great, but you just can’t say anything to me anytime you want to. When a fan threw a drink on me, and I chased him through a bar. When I caught him, I rammed his damn head through the window. Know what I told the judge [when he asked if I regretted it?] I said I regret we were on the first damn floor. Are you kidding me? You can’t just throw no drink on me.

It’s just crazy. Like, Tiger’s minding his own business, he’s on the comeback trail, and this guy comes out the woodwork. You can’t just say anything to anybody. I don’t believe that.”  


Listen to the audio over at The Big Lead.