Your Sunday Eagles Reader

The Eagles will face Kevin Kolb today, giving us all a reminder why he was a useless bill of goods sold to us as an heir apparent to a borderline hall of famer. Let’s read words! has you covered, as usual. Here’s an article about the Birds avenging that 2011 NFC Championship loss to the Cardinals that hurt so much most of us don’t even remember it!

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Your publication of record, ladies and gentlemen.

Of course, the entire premise for that article is lazy journalism, since, well, this:

Donovan McNabb was the quarterback. Tra Thomas and Jon Runyan were the bookend offensive tackles. Brian Westbrook was the running back. Dawkins was the free safety and centerpiece of Johnson's aggressive defense. 


Boy, I’m sure Michael Vick would love to avenge that loss. He was in prison when it occurred (in 2009). In fact, as Phil Sheridan notes, only eight Eagles remain from that game. AVENGE THAT SHIT!

Sure-handed Jason Avant (we’re one week away from calling him Allstate) will see more playing time with Jeremy Maclin out:

It's not unfamiliar territory for Avant, who has 34 career starts and helped fill the void when Maclin missed time last season. But Avant is most valuable to the Eagles playing in the slot, and his role is different if he is pressed into playing outside. Avant noted that the change is in the coverages he sees and how he must watch film.


An homage to DeMeco Ryans by team scribe Jeff McLane:

The Eagles have played just two games – they have a third Sunday at 2-0 Arizona – but it's difficult not to overstate when talking about Ryans. His performance in the second half of the Ravens game – five solo tackles, one sack, and an interception – was nearly perfect.


Kevin Kolb, who will aim to lead his team to mediocrity today, may miss the Rams game to attend the birth of his child.

Larry Fitzgerald praises the Eagles’ cornerbacks, including his old teammate: 

“Nnamdi relies more on his technique. He’s sound in what he’s doing,” Fitzgerald said. “DRC is DRC. He knows he’s the best athlete on the field and he knows he can make plays. He knows that if he takes a bad step he can catch anyone in the game. He’s got two picks. He’s playing with a lot of confidence right now. He’s off to a Pro Bowl start.

“I was teasing him this week. I’ve got to put my hands on him. He’s still only 173 pounds. It’ll be fun to match up with him. He’s a good friend. I still keep in touch with him, but on Sunday it’s all business.”


Demetress Bell is lost in Howard Mudd’s valley of darkness, which, thankfully, isn’t a euphemism for his ass crack:

Eagles offensive line coach Howard Mudd teaches a blocking style so unique, so counter to conventional methods, that his pupils often reach a level of frustration so deep and profound that they’re paralyzed by their own paranoia.

“The Valley of Darkness I call it,” Mudd said after a recent practice.


Great breakdown of the Eagles' secondary by Sheil Kapadia, specifically about Nnamdi Asomugha:

The numbers don’t tell the whole story here. Asomugha looks comfortable, pressing at the line of scrimmage and playing a lot of man coverage. Last week, he was matched up with Anquan Boldin and Jacoby Jones for much of the game. It should be noted that Flacco actually targeted Asomugha more than Rodgers-Cromartie (six times, by my count). While he only allowed two completions, one of them was a 21-yard touchdown. And Asmougha was flagged on two other occasions. The 25-yard touchdown to Jones was called back for a questionable offensive pass interference penalty. There was one other play where Asomugha forced an incompletion, but Rodgers-Cromartie was called for a penalty. In other words, the Ravens either got a completion or drew a penalty on four of six balls thrown Asomugha’s way.


Asomugha has, however, had success against Larry Fitzgerald in the past. Fitzgerald has only two catches against Asomugha, when matched up with him.

DeSean Jackson was fined $10k for throwing a punch last week.

Who do we think is having more fun covering the Eagles in Arizona, Derrick Gunn or John Clark? 

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Gunner is undoubtedly taking in the sights (and perhaps trying to befriend Eagles players), but Clark is in tail heaven. It’s still skirt season in the desert, and those panties aren’t going to wet themselves. 

DeMeco Ryans was mic’d up last week against the Ravens. Here’s what it sounded like:


8 Responses

  1. Thank God Kevin Kolb isn’t missing this game for the birth of his child. They might have a chance of winning if he missed it.

  2. If Donnie Drama ever does get into the HOF (an honor I’m not entirely sure he’s deserving of), who introduces him? His mom? Andy? T.O.?

  3. Nice to see from that Ryans clip that preseason really doesn’t mean anything. Birds haven’t had defensive leadership or energy since they let Weapon X go. Fly Eagles fly.

  4. really love how Kyle starts losing page views and automatically TRIES to replicate Barstool’s writing scheme.

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