The Sixers Will Unveil the World’s Largest T-Shirt Launcher Tonight

This post comes to you from an iPhone personal hotspot over a dodgy AT&T connection, since power is back but VERIZON FIOS IS STILL OUT AND I CAN’T RUN A GODDAMN BLOG WITHOUT IT!

Sorry.  

The Sixers open their season tonight and they’ll do so with  GIANT T-SHIRT LAUNCHER, named Big Bella. Be-fucking-hold: 

Screen Shot 2012-10-31 at 4.21.38 PM
Screen Shot 2012-10-31 at 4.21.38 PM

Beautiful. You know what I want to do with that thing? Shoot Verizon in the face. No one in particular. Just Verizon. As a whole. In the face.

Anyway, tonight, pencil in one gigantic t-shirt launcher and please remove one gigantic, injury-riddled center for the opener.

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8 Responses

  1. Anyone else think that radio announcer Tom McGinnis is really annoying? Guy irks me on those 97.5 promo commercials

  2. In more impressive news: during a test run at Lou Turk’s Halloween party last night, the Turbo Taint Tickler stimulated 100 pole dancers in Tinkerbell costumes, also in only 60 seconds.

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