I’ve been conditioned to hate the Yankees with every fiber of my being. But excuse me for a moment as I get something out. I’m sorry, it’s been a while and I might get it everywhere: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUL.
Sorry about your headboard.
There was a time when my phone autocompleted that. But not anymore. Ibanez is a Yankee now, and only wearing a Yankees jersey would a 40-year-old on the back end of his career hit game-tying and winning home runs in a playoff game while replacing one of the greatest players of all-time. Only in a Yankees jersey. That sort of thing only. fucking. happens. to. the. damn. Yankees.
Anyway, that’s your #dickpunch for this morning: Raul Ibanez, beloved Phillie, now a Yankee, pinch-hit for Alex Rodriguez in the ninth inning yesterday and tied and won the game for the Yankees. And, if for just a brief moment, you found yourself rooting for the Bronx Bombers. Along with Shane Victorino:
Of course, there’s a silver lining to your confused pain– the complete emasculation of Alex Rodriguez by good guy Ibanez. Look at these New York columnists lining up to bury A-Rod. Raul did that, kids. Raul did that.