We Have Defeated the Terrorists: Uber’s Ice Cream On-Demand Trucks Arrive Today

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Ummm, yes and please.

You may have heard of Uber, the ride-on-demand service available in many cities including Philadelphia. Today, they are launching Uber Ice Cream, and it’s exactly what it sounds like: you summon an ice cream truck to you, on your whim.

The inside scoop:

  • Ice cream trucks will be on the road from 11 AM to 5 PM on Friday, July 19th
  • Demand for ice cream trucks will be very high and availability very limited. It may take multiple tries to find an available truck. Please be patient! We’ll be working all day to deliver as much ice cream as possible.
  • No cash required! Your ice creams will be charged directly to your Uber account.

From the sounds of it, the ice cream on-demand service will be in extremely high demand today– temperature 702 degrees. It’s $25 for five people (minimum), so this will be best suited for small offices or Delmon Young. Simply download the Uber app on your iPhone or Android to summon a truck full of tasty treats.

Take that, Tsarnaev:

Photo by officer Sean Murphy, who released these photos yesterday in response to the Rolling Stone... he was relieved of his duties shortly thereafter

Photo by officer Sean Murphy, who released these photos yesterday in response to the Rolling Stone cover… he was relieved of his duties shortly thereafter

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  • Joe July 19, 2013 at 10:07 am

    Yet another story that has absolutely nothing to do with Philadelphia sports other than a backhanded comment pointing out that Delmon Young is a fatty. Something that we all knew. Someone please remind me again why i check this site everyday.

    • TIm Sheckler July 19, 2013 at 10:42 am

      Hey Joe, you fuck… what the hell was he supposed to write about? It’s the all star break and there’s absolutely nothing going on in the world of Philly Sports.

      Have you turned on Sports Talk Radio recently? They’re doing hacky countdowns of your “favorite all-time player” and other garbage like that.

      Go back to working at the WaWa in Delco you jerkoff

      • Pope Francis July 19, 2013 at 11:03 am


      • Kyle Scott July 19, 2013 at 12:22 pm

        I laughed.

      • Joe July 19, 2013 at 12:36 pm

        Sheckler. Go fuck yourself.

        Thank you.

    • Juniata Ray July 19, 2013 at 10:43 am

      Probably just to see if you can complain about something today. Seems like there’s more and more people bitching about the content anymore. Tired of it.

      Leave if you don’t like it. I myself enjoy it and will continue to come back.

      • Joe July 19, 2013 at 12:51 pm

        People bitch about it because its dumb. If you don’t like it then maybe you should stop reading the comments.

        For the most part, i thoroughly enjoy Kyle’s irreverent approach to local sports and how the typical Philadelphia fan views them. With that being said, Kyle should know that the typical Philly fan doesn’t give a fuck about how excited he is about his ice cream app and what he is watching on Netflix.

        By all means, if Kyle enjoys writing about dumb shit every once in a while, I will deal with it because as i mentioned before, he has a good perspective on SPORTS issues.

    • Big Balls Chip July 19, 2013 at 12:19 pm

      This is probably KITMIARCS again. I have a feeling he’s been posting under regular names like “John” and “Joe” etc. lately. Sounds like every bit the gash that KITMIARCS was and is.

  • Crucify Wheels July 19, 2013 at 10:53 am

    While I understand the current lack of debatable and newsworthy topics revolving around Philadelphia sports, I would prefer if Kyle maintained his integrity and kept the majority of his non-sports pieces solely in the realms of tits and Marcus Vick tweets.

    • Crucify Wheels July 19, 2013 at 10:59 am

      actual Marcus tweet from 7/16:

      Chicks luv a n**** with a Lil dawg in them? Or Nah?

  • Vic Vinegar July 20, 2013 at 8:45 am

    That pic of the bomber is sick. Never seen it before. I really wish they just put one between the eyes on that cocksucker. Fuck you and your violent religion you use as a crutch to act like an asshole.

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