Two Phillies Fan Were Arrested After They Snuck into Wrigley Field and Tried to Steal Ivy

Screen Shot 2013-09-03 at 12.28.34 PM
Gudknecht, during happier times (from his Twitter)

Two Phillies fans, in Chicago for the weekend series with the Cubs, were arrested when they tried to sneak into Wrigley and steal ivy:

Two Pennsylvania men were arrested overnight at Wrigley Field after they managed to squeeze through metal security bars, climb through a window and tried to steal ivy from the stadium, authorities said.

Kevin Burge and Steven Gudknecht, both 25, were charged with misdemeanor trespassing when they were arrested at Wrigley about 3:45 a.m., police said. Team security spotted them on closed-circuit cameras, entering the stadium, and when police arrived, the two were “found on the field, as they were trying to get ivy,” said Chicago Cubs spokesman Julian Green.

Green, it would seem, is just relishing the limelight and loves puns. Here’s what he told the Chicago Tribune:

Police found no evidence that anything was stolen or damaged in the building, Mirabelli said.

Mirabelli would not say how the men managed to squeeze through the bars.

One of the men is 6-feet-tall and weighs 170 pounds and the other man is 6-feet-3 inches tall and weighs 180 pounds, Mirabelli said.

“When you have two individuals intent on committing foul play, they are going to find a way,” said Green, saying that going through the security bars poses “serious bodily harm” to anyone who tries it.

Foul play— nice.

Burge and Gudknecht are due in a Chicago court on September 26, a fate they could have avoided if they had gone about this differently. Squeezing through the gate, where there are undoubtedly security cameras, is the dumbest way to seek an evening of debauchery in a Major League ballpark.

What they should’ve done is taken a page out of this book and fallen asleep until after the ballpark closed. Or hid in one of the what has to be many dark corners at Wrigley. Or just volunteered to be a part of the Phillies’ bullpen.

But I’m still not sure how they got caught stealing the ivy– that stuff is thick enough to hide Zack Morris’ cell phone and Andre Dawson. Surely two slender 25-year-olds could’ve slipped in there, no?

Anyway, do you know these guys? Are you these guys (Gudknecht follows me on Twitter)? There has to be photos that need to see the light of day.

H/T to Anthony

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8 Responses

  1. When I saw the CNN headline, I was really hoping it was a Carmen Sandiego-style heist. Stealing “the ivy from Wrigley” sounds like it would fit in with Mt. Rushmore or the Eiffel Tower in her trophy room.

  2. Sounds like a couple of dumbass white boys with more bravado than common sense, as if they REALLY thought they could actually pull off such a caper. God should just come down from heaven and clean the gene pool of knuckleheads like those two.

  3. I know these guys, Steve is my childhood neighbor. We went through public schooling together and also graduated Temple U with me. Steve is a diehard Phillies fan. It doesn’t surprise me they went to extremes to try and grab a legendary piece of sport history. This story is only going to add to his baseball-fandom cred.

  4. I applaud the shit out of this! Good try at least!

    Also, Foul Play – Coked Up Chevy Chase…great movie!

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