Deadspin has a long-running series written by Drew Magary about why your team sucks. Up today? The Eagles.
Getting rid of Reid took ages, so you would think that Eagles fans would be excited for Kelly and give him at least a year to get his house in order. But Eagles fans are the most ungrateful people alive. Your typical Eagles fan is a bloated, sweating neckbeard who spends the entire game frowning with his arms crossed, regardless of the score. If the Eagles were up by 30, their fans would still look at them as if to say, “Is that it?” They constantly act as if the world has to show them something. You know what, Sal from Port Richmond? You are not royalty. The world owes you NOTHING. In fact, it owes you less than nothing. This world was not constructed as some elaborate machine designed to please you. Don’t sit there and act fucking surprised when life doesn’t work out the way you think it ought to. The Eagles suck and your subcontracting job paving roads will be cut a year from now. Tough fucking luck.
Before you see a shade of purple unknown to man, I’ll caution you that they do this for every team.
Read it here.