Shane Victorino’s God Awful Postseason Beard is Now For Sale on eBay

Voila_Capture653Oh, this is so gross.*

With the help of Gillette (since they run shit in Boston), Shane Victorino and David Ortiz have placed their beards, and the razors used to shave them off, on eBay, with the proceeds going toward charity.

Here’s the listing:

Up for auction is a 100% authentic Shane Victorino 2013 Championship Beard Ball, grown, groomed and worn with pride through the 2012-2013 season by none other than the Flyin’ Hawaiian himself. This fully authentic beard hair was trimmed and shaved clean on November 4th at Gillette’s World Shaving Headquarters in Boston as part of a charity shave-off. Included with the beard ball is the actual Fusion ProGlide razor used in the shave and a card of authenticity signed by Victorino.

All proceeds go to Movember, the global charity that gets men to grow, and women to support, the moustache for the 30 days of November while raising funds and awareness for men’s health to combat prostate and testicular cancer. For more information, please visit Movember.com.

Act now and obtain your piece of Boston baseball history.

And the accompanying photo:

Voila_Capture654

PUBES! THOSE ARE PUBES!! COULDN’T THEY HAVE CHOSEN SOMEONE WHOSE FACIAL HAIR DOESN’T LOOK LIKE PUBES?!

The current bid for Victorino’s short and curlies is $1,650 with over eight days remaining. Why do I feel like I have a hairball in my throat?

*But honestly, if someone put Cliff Lee’s 2009 toenail clippings on eBay, I’d go up to five figures.

via NESN

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8 Responses

  1. Wow, how can you truly authenticate it? They should offer the DNA test with it just to be sure. I look forward to this being on an episode of Pawn Stars this upcoming summer. Chum Lee will probably glue them to his face.

  2. This kind of thing would have sold for an order of magnitude more coming from a member of the ’04 Sox. I’ll bet those facks wish they had taken advantage of this kind of stuff before Boston fans got entitled.

  3. i applaud the fact that the proceeds are going to charity and all, but what kind of sick freak drops that kind of coin just to claim he has the discarded hair of another man? reminds of me of the movie ted when the guy has the air frozen remains of lance armstrong’s nut, except this is real life. SMH!

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