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Eat It, Flakes

By Kyle Scott

Published: Dec 29th, 2013 · 11:10 AM EST

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Yesterday was a good day. The two men who haunted the Wells Fargo Center for the past year or two got what was coming to them, both in somewhat hilarious and karmatic fashion.

 

Ilya Bryzgalov

Two things:

1) Why does the ice in Edmonton look like the ice at a local rink whose Zamboni broke down? Making it worse was the game being broadcast (broad is debatable here) on the Comcast Network, meaning no HD and black bars on both top and bottom and sides for those of us with Verizon. It was like watching a bootleg screening of Miracle, if Miracle was about a little-used forward sticking one in the eye of space cadet goaltender.

2) Didn’t think I’d ever watch and transcribe a Bryzgalov press conference again, because the ECHL doesn’t stream that sort of thing. Guess I was wrong.

How poetic it was that it came down to a shootout, and Bryz, who couldn’t stop a breakaway or make a big save for the OB, seemingly ever, was thrust into the position of having to win his team a game.

No such luck.

4-3, good guys, with Michael Raffl (!) scoring the winning goal and Bryz displaying his trademark bad body language:

Was a late-night winner in a battle between two mediocre teams in Edmonton on a holiday weekend worth the $23 million buyout? OF COURSE IT WAS! That’s a RAFFL ticket worth picking up.

Full shootout:

Sad Bryz press conference here.

 

Andrew Bynum

LOON ALERT.

The Cavs suspended Andrew Bynum indefinitely yesterday for “conduct detrimental to the team.” No specific reason was given.

From ESPN.com:

Cleveland has until Jan. 7 to decide if it will guarantee his contract for the rest of the season. Bynum signed a two-year, $24 million deal with the Cavs last summer, but the team-friendly contract included only $6 million in guaranteed money.

The decision to suspend Bynum was made Friday, sources said. Bynum did not travel with the team to Boston for Saturday’s game against the Celtics.

“It’s a terrible situation internally with our team,” All-Star guard Kyrie Irving said before the Cavs faced the Celtics. “It’s something we have to get over.”

It is unclear what led to Bynum’s suspension. Cavs coach Mike Brown did not disclose any details regarding the suspension but expressed concern for his players.

“I’m worried about the guys in the locker room,” Brown said prior to Saturday afternoon’s game. “It’s simple as that. In our business, there are a lot of ups and a lot of downs throughout the season.

Wow. The Andrew Bynum Effect: It’s a terrible situation internally and I’m worried about the guys in the locker room. I’m inclined to believe that he sexed someone’s, or multiple someones’, mother(s). But I could be wrong.

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE!

Due to Andrew Bynum's suspension, the Cavs have canceled tomorrow's Bynum Fathead giveaway. Cavs owner Dan Gilbert owns Fathead.

— Darren Rovell (@darrenrovell) December 28, 2013

#NBA sources now telling @FOXSportsOH teams not interested in Andrew Bynum and that #Cavs will release him before contract is guaranteed.

— Sam Amico (@AmicoHoops) December 28, 2013

What does this mean? It means that Bynum, who signed a two-year, $24 million contract with the Cavs last summer, will keep only $6 million and not be paid his additional $6 million this season or the $12 million he would’ve been guaranteed next season if he remained on the roster this summer. 2013 KARMA BACKWASH FTW!