Dog bites man. Meh.

Man bites dog. Bath salts.

Dog pisses on logo of obnoxious team that man plays for. BLOG POST.

In a Reddit AMA (Ask Me Anything), Washington Post writers Adam Kilgore and James Wagner relayed the following tale:

Jayson Werth used to bring around his dog, Magnus, an enormous, gray Great Dane. The dog was the size of a small horse — if he stood on his hind legs, it could put his front legs on Werth’s shoulder. Just a massive dog.

So Magnus was in the clubhouse one day in 2012. That night, the Nats got into it with the Cubs — the game when Bo Porter almost fought a Cubs coach and the benches cleared after Harper got hit. The Nationals just crushed the Cubs, and so the mood in the clubhouse was elated, one of the happiest clubhouses I think I’ve ever been in. They were rolling and they were together.

Werth is still in the shower as Magnus is walking around the clubhouse. Magnus stops in the middle of the room, right on the Nationals logo, lifts his back leg and unleashes the foulest-smelling stream of dog urine in world history. And it kept going. Storen starts waving his arm like a third base coach. Clippard yells, “Now THAT’S Natitude!” Reporters, players, clubbies are all laughing their head off.

Werth walks from the training room to his locker. He’s got no clue what’s going on. He hears all this commotion, looks over and his eyes go bug-eyed. “I told Morse to quit feeding him so much water!” he says. Everyone cracks up. One of the funniest damn things I’ve ever seen.

Magnus is not welcome in the Nationals clubhouse.

Somehow, I’m sure Jayson will blame the Phillies or their fans for this.