And Ryan Howard is Already Super Defensive About Your Skepticism

Kyle Scott - April 10, 2014

Photo credit: Howard Smith-USA TODAY Sports

Photo credit: Howard Smith-USA TODAY Sports

Speaking to the media today, Ryan Howard, via Ryan Lawrence,

“In all actuality we’ve actually played very well this year. I disagree with everybody else. Our record doesn’t necessarily reflect that right now, but, you know, we’ve played well. We had three real bad games. So the only thing to do is go out there and try to win again.”

… and via Pat Gallen (@PatGallen_975):

“It’s 8 games. You guys are trying to start a panic attack. If you wanna panic go ahead and panic, but don’t bring it around here.”

Absurd, on several fronts: 1) Does Ryan Howard realize that the media isn’t panicking, they’re just doing their job, which isn’t to be a cheerleader? Not saying that they can’t be a little ridiculous sometimes (…), but Howard, a veteran, knows this. Right?

2) Howard has to understand that this isn’t a minor blip on the radar. The Phillies have been bad for two full seasons, they won nine spring training games, and they’ve started the regular season 3-5.

3) “… we’ve played really well this year… we had three real bad games.” They’ve played eight. Three were really bad. That’s not good.


  • Comments on wrong post April 10, 2014 at 5:25 pm

    A brewpub is perfect for Conshy and solidifies it as the whitest place in Montco. That being said, I will definitely enjoy some brews and games there.

    • eh? April 10, 2014 at 9:38 pm

      Why are you inferring that something is wrong with “white places” in your post?

  • Comments on wrong post April 10, 2014 at 5:30 pm

    Love how Mikey Miss got owned by Rhino on the radio

  • Mumbly Stairs April 10, 2014 at 5:31 pm

    “Our record doesn’t necessarily reflect that right now, but, you know, we’ve played well.”

    Get him the fuck out of this city. I can live with his 180 K’s, .250ish average and 25ish homers (that’s a full healthy season), but he’s been infected with the Jimmy Rollins Lazy AIDS.

  • Cartman April 10, 2014 at 5:34 pm

    I do not, in any way whatsoever, expect the Phillies to turn it around BUT…

    Didn’t you write an eerily similar post when Giroux talked about the playoffs?

    And now you’ve had to take back all the shit you said?

    I like how we don’t learn lessons.

    • ThePhillyFlash April 10, 2014 at 5:39 pm

      The difference is that the Flyers are younger and more talented, they simply stumbled out of the gate before regaining their footing and roaring into the playoffs. The Phillies are old, their talent is decaying, and they’re still dumber than a box of hammers when it comes to fundamentals. One year is a blip, two years is a pattern, the Phils are now into what’s looking like a third year out of the postseason, and I do NOT see this kennel making a run like the Flyers had.

      • Cartman April 10, 2014 at 5:48 pm

        100% agree, as I said I don’t expect them to turn it around.

        I guess what I’m saying is the same thing a bunch of us were saying after Kyle’s post about Giroux… what do you expect Howard to say? “You guys are right, we’re awful, we’ve got no chance, we’re panicking and you may as well just stop following us.”? He’d get destroyed. This is the only thing Howard could say. It’s not newsworthy, at all.

        • ThePhillyFlash April 10, 2014 at 6:00 pm

          Of course Howard can say that, but he’s going to get slammed anyway as fans are watching this dreck and saying he’s delusional. But yeah, it’s not newsworthy.

      • Bare Essentials Ad on 95 South April 10, 2014 at 10:05 pm

        The other difference is that there is no difference. He was right to call the Flyers a shitty fucking team because they were. They had a ~4% chance to make the playoffs after two months. That means for every 25 teams in similar situations, only one turns it around.

        The Flyers were that one this year. That doesn’t mean you set your watch by teams who shit through their mattresses suddenly becoming competent, especially in a sport with half as many (real) playoff spots.

  • Comments on wrong post April 10, 2014 at 5:38 pm

    Wow, cant believe DjaCc missed his first workout with Washington.

  • Bo Bo April 10, 2014 at 5:51 pm

    I love Howard…..he brought the city it’s first championship in years and we can never forget this. But I think he’s in denial. He see’s it, this team is nothing compared to those 2005-2010 squads. He’s defensive early because he’s showing his cards. It sucks.

    Here’s hoping to a good game on Sunday(kids opening day) – when I spend a shitload of cash bringing the family down there, and I’ll cheer this group on a few last times before it’s broken down by next season.

    Who knows, maybe Franco, J.P Crawford, Knapp, Biddel and Colvin will pan out –

    • Miserable Marty April 10, 2014 at 6:29 pm

      Man you’re too positive about the Phillies for this site.

      Now if you can put down the tall glass of red Phillies kool-aid for just a second,you’ll realize that the Phillies are an aging,overpaid,unproductive mediocre team who at best will win 70-75 games.

  • comments on right post April 10, 2014 at 5:53 pm

    another case of Philly Shitty Media. 8 games in a 162 game season is the same as 4 games in an 81 game NBA season.

    Sixers first 4 games= Wins against Miami, Washington, Chicago…and a loss to Golden State.

    I am in no way saying this team is good, but the 2008 Phillies started 2-4 and were at one point 8-10. Good thing the media jumped ship then too.

    I think the Phillies win 71 games and finish in 4th behind the Mets…but it’s way to early to geek the hell out. Most would agree that they could be 5-3 without Papelshit and they truly shouldn’t have blown both of those late games.

  • Hodor April 10, 2014 at 6:00 pm


    • Roose Bolton April 11, 2014 at 8:14 am

      Hodor, I’m going to peel off your skin and masturbate with it.

  • Macho Macho Macnow April 10, 2014 at 6:42 pm

    Man it’s been a tough start for The Big Piece but it’s April and baseball is back. Now let’s get back to my great Manly Burger Hunt. I love meat, because I’m very manly and a guy, so I’ve been searching high and low for a truly great burger. Also I’m a guy who loves beer. You know, a guys guy. That’s me and I opened a terrific brew pub and you should all come check it out. We only brew manly beers, for the rough and tumble poker playing, guy movie watching crowd.

    • Macnow Disciple April 10, 2014 at 7:15 pm

      Glen, which is the more manly movie to stroke one out to, 300 or The Scorpion King? And do you suggest a thick, beefy black beer with a smoky taste to moisten my throat after wrapping my lips around one of your veiny kielbasa? Also, where’s a good place in Conshohocken to acquire a young Asian man servant for the night? You’re the best Glen!

  • Mellonhead April 10, 2014 at 6:43 pm

    Ryan Howard should be more worried about getting a nose job than what the media thinks

    • Ryan's Flat Nose April 10, 2014 at 6:57 pm

      My white girlfriend loves my nose. It’s nice and flat. It stays out of the way while I lick her wet gash. She loves my money too.

      • That guy April 10, 2014 at 7:07 pm

        Said no black man ever. Especially about eating pussy.

        • Ryan's Flat Nose April 10, 2014 at 7:11 pm

          If you want the white prize you gotta lay some tongue on that shit. White poon tastes better anyway. Plus the white bitches insist on it. You don’t think I’m gonna get stuck with some black gold digger? I love how my girl fantasizes about all the numbers in my bank when I’m drilling her with the black anaconda.

  • MM April 10, 2014 at 7:57 pm

    Black pussy taste like Funyons

  • 4 Finger Benny April 10, 2014 at 8:00 pm

    Different sport same bullshit. Sweet article, lacking retweets tho.

  • MM April 10, 2014 at 8:02 pm

    Asian pussy is a mystery, nobody eats that shit

    • William Rhodes April 10, 2014 at 10:01 pm

      Wrong. They call me the Yellow King.

      • Black Box April 10, 2014 at 10:31 pm

        Eating pu$$y is never good. It’s just that blacks are filthy and I wouldn’t eat a Baboon out so I’m def not touching a Sheboon. Asians I’d only Bukakke.

  • Done With the Phillies Until Amaro is Gone April 10, 2014 at 8:21 pm

    I’m done with this collection of shiftless slackers, going through the motions with little of no effort, not caring either way if they win or lose, STEALING MONEY, and then calling out the fans (like so many Jason Babins) for questioning their country-club motives.

    I haven’t been to a game or watched one on TV since the end of the 102-win season (when their main concern was helping Chollie break the club record, and not necessarily what was best for setting them up in that post-season.) With 2 weeks to go in that season, they switched it off for 10 days, and still have not switched it back on.

    It’s not because they are losing, but because from top to bottom, THEY AREN’T EVEN TRYING.
    Players are fat and entitled, and just go through the motions.
    Manuel (when he was here) allowed the lackadaisical atmosphere to exist.
    Sandberg doesn’t seem to have any answers either.
    Amaro is a clueless imbecile whose actions are as if he was on another team’s payroll.
    Montgomery is a pompous jackass of an owner, content on raking in the cash and, instead of improving the product on the field, he is content to distract the fans with the outdated phanatic concept and a whole array of ridiculous smokescreens/promotions.

    The only time I listen to the Phillies is when I’m trapped in my car on my way home from work. Which brings me to my next point:

    WHO IS THAT JACKASS ON THE PRE-GAME SHOW? Not Josh Innes, but the guy who comes on after him. He is an unlistenable moron, who makes Chris Farley’s nervous interviewer character on SNL look smooth:

    Farley: “So, um… were you uh…. you were in the Beatles, weren’t you?”

    Paul McCartney: ” Yes, I was.”

    Farley: “Umm… what was… what, um…. what was that like?”


    • 4 Finger Benny April 10, 2014 at 8:33 pm

      If you havent been to or watched a game how the fuck do you know whats going on? Gtfo you nerd. Its trendy to hate the Phils this guys is a prime example.

      • Done With the Phillies Until Amaro is Gone April 10, 2014 at 8:39 pm

        Fuck off, jackass. You must not be able to read, or you would have seen the part where I said about listening on the radio.

        Plus, they have this thing called “sports news” on some of the TV channels, and then there’s the “interwebs”, which you seem to be unable to navigate correctly. Try taking those 4 fingers out of your ass before typing next time.

        As I said earlier, FUCK OFF!

    • Chip'N'Dip April 11, 2014 at 10:09 am

      It’s not that Ryne doesn’t have the answers, it’s that the Phils are stuck with the guys like Howard and Rollins who have that lackadaisical attitude and denial. Who are stuck in their ways, who have never tried to change/ evolve/ or grow as players. If Ryne is to stick them on the bench, he devalues any possible trade value for later down the road, if they could, in fact get them to waive their no-trade clauses. I would rather watch guys like Franco, Ruf, etc that are trying to make a name for themselves, but Amaro swamped the team with those two contracts for two players that were the core, but noticeably declining after ’10. Hell, Ryan Howard’s plate acumen deteriorated tremendously after ’08. He always has looked like he’s guessing, and always guessing fastball since. In ’06 and ’07 he would take balls the opposite field and deposit them in the stands, fastballs, curveballs and sliders, because he would wait on the ball and identify what it was. Now he’s trying to quicken his bat by swinging early and guessing pitch and location ahead of time….terrible. It’s like the QB that would determine what WR he would throw to in the huddle, and not take his eye off him from lining up until he throws the pass….

  • 4 Finger Benny April 10, 2014 at 8:50 pm

    You’re really sticking it to the Phils by not watching yet listening and watching highlights. We will call you for the next championship run you squid. What a fucking clown.

    • Done With the Phillies Until Amaro is Gone April 10, 2014 at 8:59 pm

      Hey jackass, you’ve got your head so far up your boi Ryan Howard’s ass that you can’t think straight.

      I never said I was “sticking it to the Phils”. I am CHOOSING not to waste my time and money at the ballpark, nor 3 hours of my time watching a game on TV, as long as the Phillies organization is not serious about winning.

      Only a douchebag like you would equate that personal preference with some kind of boycott against an organization (as if they would care).

      But you go ahead and root for this collection of listless slobs and front-office weasels, as you hand over your money to them like some starry-eyed fan-boy. I’m sure Dave Montgomery and the phanatic appreciate your blind loyalty, as you strive to be a good little 4-for-4 boy, like your mentor Anthony the Gorilla.

      Now get the fuck out of here, you pitiful Ryan Howard/Jimmy Rollins fanboy!

      • 4 Finger Benny April 10, 2014 at 9:14 pm

        Cool story missing a 90s SNL reference.

  • Remember when the karate kid fell in love with a gook April 10, 2014 at 8:58 pm

    Asians have weird pussy hair. They hate shaving

    • MM April 11, 2014 at 11:34 am

      Its like the quart of white rice you get with their food nobody eats it

  • Done With the Phillies Until Amaro is Gone April 10, 2014 at 9:13 pm

    Howard: “In all actuality we’ve actually played very well this year”

    This is quite possibly the most ridiculous thing said by a Phillie in a long time (and Amaro has been doing a lot of talking recently.)

    • nick pappagiorgio April 10, 2014 at 10:07 pm

      Says the guy who “never watches or listens to games” but miraculously has a million opinions on the team. Whatever, dork.

      • FREE KWAME!!! April 11, 2014 at 8:24 am

        Hey. Nick. I never thought I would say this, but this guy is WAY worse than you ever were. Fuck you done. Go read jezebel when you’re on your period.

  • Maxie April 10, 2014 at 9:27 pm

    I am not panicking at all. This is what I expected. Howard will never be the same no matter what Rube the Boob smokes in order to sustain his delusions.

  • Fuck RAJ April 10, 2014 at 9:44 pm

    The big piece of

  • Ryan's Flat Nose April 10, 2014 at 10:34 pm

    Hey it’s not panic time. You guys are all getting worked up for nothing. I’m still getting my game checks. For some dumb reason Channel 6 gives me more money just because my number happens to be 6. My girl is still happy so everything is fine.

    • Uncle Meat April 11, 2014 at 1:57 pm

      Is the Piece Mansion on schedule? How’s construction coming along?

  • Five Dollar Footlong April 10, 2014 at 10:58 pm

    I’m here eating my BMT and all you fans have your panties in a twist because we are 3-6.
    This is The Big Piece reminding you to get your people and come out and see us play the Florida Marlins.

  • Miserable Marty April 10, 2014 at 11:03 pm

    Oh well we still have the Flyers.

  • Budweiser April 10, 2014 at 11:32 pm

    Saw Howard and his tiny white Eagles’ cheerleader at the KOP mall during the 2008 NLCS. I said “good luck tomorrow, Ryan” dude looked like he wanted to kill me. Like he had some right to blend in with the everyone else as the Phillies were on the verge of the World Series. Fuck him.

    • The Aquatic Club April 11, 2014 at 8:17 am

      Were you thinking in your head “you fucking pompous N” ???

      • Glen Macnow April 11, 2014 at 8:53 am

        Eat my manly meat. At my manly brewery. I cum three times per episode of Vikings.

  • Senile Citizens Bank Park April 11, 2014 at 8:29 am

    Welcome to the jungle……….

  • Andy Schreiber April 11, 2014 at 8:45 am

    That’s the first time that Ryan Howard and super defense were used in the same sentence.

    Oh wait.

  • Poon Sniffer April 11, 2014 at 9:03 am

    Dam i’d never lik a pussy after a black dongie been in it, cum inside or not, I dunt care how white she’sis.

  • The Big ______ April 11, 2014 at 10:24 am

    the guy is hitting .200 and strikeouts 37.1% of the time.

    $25 million
    $25 million
    $25 million

    left on his contract

    would he please join the Crips

  • Tom Selleck April 11, 2014 at 11:19 am

    I know its far fetched at this point with the way they played, but a couple days ago you were ripping the media apart and feeding them crow about the Flyers. Howard pretty much said exactly was Giroux said earlier in the year during a shitty start so maybe wait a little longer before you go condemning them to the bottom of the NL East for the whole season. The media was in a panic for the Flyers bad start but theyre just doing their jobs for the Phillies? There are a lot of parallels to be drawn with the Howard quote and Giroux and you may have to serve up a heaping helping of crow to yourself if they can turn this around.

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