Jason Kelce Helps Explain Lane Johnson’s $17k Rookie Dinner Bill

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Lane’s bill, longer than Foles’ johnson

On Friday night, Lane Johnson tweeted a picture of his receipt from the Eagles’ rookie dinner at Del Friscos. It cost… a lot. $17,747 a lot. Johnson received the expected backlash in this post-Richie Incognito world of sports sensitivity. But today, everyman Jason Kelce explained why you should just get off Johnson’s dick because he’s making nearly $20 million over four years and, yeah, he’s got this. From Matt Lombardo at NJ.com, who did a nice job of itemizing the bill:

“The bottom line is, it was a team function,” Kelce explained. “Nobody forced Lane to do that. This is like any profession, I feel like. Anytime you get a promotion or a raise, the first thing you do is take your family out or take your friends out and people around you that you care about.

“I just signed a big deal and obviously I’m doing to do something for these guys, I’m obviously not going to take all of it. There’s other people who contributed to me getting the bigger deal.” It gets portrayed in the media and they like to act like they have a clue what’s going on in our locker room, but the fact of the matter is we have a really tight knit group of guys and Lane was more than happy to do that.”

“Everybody who has been drafted by the Philadelphia Eagles has taken the veterans out on a rookie dinner,” Kelce pointed out. “When I was a rookie we went to Barclay Prime. It was me, Danny Watkins, Julian Vandervelde, and I’m not going to get into what that bill was. It was on par with Lane’s, it was pretty close. Danny paid the most because he was the highest draft pick and biggest signing bonus, then me and Julian split the rest of it.”

Haha. Danny Watkins paid the most.

But for real, this stuff has been happening in football and pro sports for years. It’s part of the process. What comes around goes around. And Kelce actually has a leg to stand on beyond just his rookie dinner when it comes to generosity– he’s been everymanning the shit out of this town all spring and left $100 tip for a bartender in Avalon. He’s a man of the people and if the man of the people says it’s cool that Lane Johnson had to buy big, hungry men dinner, then that’s fine by me.

Oh, and according to Lombardo, Evan Mathis and Todd Herremans helped foot the bill.

The wine made up a substantial chunk of the bill, as it usually does for rich people. But what I want to know is which shanty folk ordered:

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YOU’RE MILLIONAIRES, GODDAMMIT! ACT LIKE IT.

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33 Responses

  1. Ugh, you know its a slow time of the sports year when people are getting on Lane Johnson about this kind of shit. “This just in: Millionaires run up huge check at local restaurant.” Seriously? Its not even that high all things considered. When I heard Cuz and Ellis teasing this on WIP this afternoon they made it sound like the check was in the 100k range. Weak.

  2. Violation for doing that to rookie nfl players when they have a short shell life in the game

  3. The bigger crime is Del Friscos actually charging for soda on such a large tab. That’s pretty ridiculous.

  4. I’m no scientist, but a $472 auto-gratuity on a $15,740 bill before taxes is like 2%. I hope the boys left a few extra shekels.

    Also, I count 12 steaks, so I would say there’s at least ten of them there. So with about a dozen 300-pounders and two rounds of Remy Martin doubles, 17 grand isn’t outrageous.

    1. now that Kyle Scott has an assistant he can figure it out, but usually gratuity on a check like that is food-only and the bar is separate. The $472 probably went to the food server(s), and a bar-tab tip was separate.

      Could be way wrong, but the normal 18% gratuity on 472 would mean they got the gratuity off of around $2600, which looks close to the food bill part of this.

  5. You, again, show that you have no idea what being “on somebody’s dick” means. It does not mean criticizing them. Christ….

  6. Wait til you guys see my rookie celebration bill from Petco… I didn’t even know chewtoys took batteries!

    1. The same reason why people buy BMW and Mercedes even though they consistently rank near the bottom in consumer satisfaction polls.

      1. How will you satisfy uppity fucks who spent 80 grand on a car assbag?

        BTW, I love my BMW. It’s old, don’t you judge me kids.

        1. That’s better.

          Full disclosure: I use ‘Skipper’ when I troll for grammar and spelling corrections.

        2. I’m very disappointed in your awful use of English. Here, please go take a bath with this toaster.

        3. And you forgot a space in “‘Have’sorry faggot stickler.”

          I didn’t beat you with a ruler hard enough.

          1. And before I have to smack you again, the extra R in my name is for Retard.

    1. They have to pay the Skanky Ho on the Morning Show to be their spokes-h0rse. Not only does she get free steak, apples, sugar cubes, and an allowance, but they pay for her monthly visits to get her beef curtains disinfected.

  7. What a spineless pussy you are! Is mentioning a name from WIP against the law or something? What happened to my comment.

    1. Get with the program! The names of certain female morning WIP hosts and fox29 traffic sluts will not pass the censorship filter, so you need to get creative. Are you new here?

  8. Hey Lane you can’t have it both ways bro. If your gonna tweet that bill out and on top take a picture you can’t bitch and moan about what people are gonna say about it. It’s no secret that rookies take all there postion vets out to dinner. To be honest it’s no big deal. It happens on every team in every city in every sport.

  9. Maybe you can get your new assistant to explain that one to you with his illustrious Kutztown education.

  10. Well when you pay 10$ FOR A CAN OF CREAMED FUCKING CORN. You’ll see a high bill afterwards Sons.

    Mr. Johnson how do you like older ladies? With a name like that? Growl…

  11. I’m with Kyle on that last section – who the fuck would be ordering slop like Coors Light and Bud Light? YUCK!

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