The Phillies are Playing Tonight and No One is There

Kyle Scott - June 11, 2014


pic via local mystery writer Allen Schatz


  • Phil June 11, 2014 at 7:26 pm

    My 8-year-old put the game on and immediately said “there is absolutely nobody at the Phillies game.” Are you still hiring writers?

  • Next! June 11, 2014 at 7:28 pm

    Yet .300 Monty will continue to be smug.

  • some guy from the boro June 11, 2014 at 7:32 pm

    Yep, Im here and its the worst its been all season. Shitty night for a game. But jimmy is 2 hits away from tying Schmitty.

    • SPQR June 11, 2014 at 8:51 pm

      Good. More importantly 3 more hits until we can trade him.

      • Mutumbo Fudgehammer June 11, 2014 at 8:59 pm

        2 hits away from 4 month jog.

      • Bob June 12, 2014 at 7:27 am

        Why do you want to trade him? So you can watch what after that? I don’t want him or Lee or Utley traded until the guy doing the evaluating of the prospects we get in return is no longer Ruben Amaro.

        • KK215 June 12, 2014 at 8:38 am

          Amen, Bob. He’ll only get fleeced again.

  • Andy Schreiber June 11, 2014 at 7:44 pm

    They *are* playing the Padres.

    Quick – name 3 Padres players!


    That’s how Petco Park looks on a regular basis.

    • some guy from the boro June 11, 2014 at 7:49 pm

      And your point is………………….?

      • some guy from the boro June 11, 2014 at 8:08 pm

        Cool handle steal bro.

        • some guy from the boro June 11, 2014 at 8:15 pm

          jesus christ, will you get a fucking life bro?

          • Johnthebaptist June 11, 2014 at 8:23 pm

            yea man

    • Mellonhead June 11, 2014 at 7:50 pm

      You from San Diego or something?

      • Andy Schreiber June 12, 2014 at 8:44 am

        PA native, but have lived in SD for over 20 years.

        • SH June 12, 2014 at 9:30 am

          who uses their real name and picture in the comments section?

          • Andy Schreiber June 12, 2014 at 10:35 am

            People who don’t spend all their time insulting Kyle or a local news weather girl?

            People who make actual sports-related comments?

            People who neither the time or inclination to come up with unfunny/unoriginal pseudonyms?

    • Hipster Jim's Indie iPod June 11, 2014 at 7:59 pm

      I can’t tell if this guy is real

  • Hot Dog June 11, 2014 at 7:49 pm

    I love sex

  • No BobbleHead, No fans June 11, 2014 at 8:00 pm

    You better give away something good if you want fans to attend.

  • marley66 June 11, 2014 at 8:18 pm

    It wasn’t too long ago that peeps were saying this turned into a baseball town. Somewhere zzz Jeffrey Lurie is lol while his undercarriage gets a how’s your father from a smoking hot Asian broad.

  • That's considered a sellout in Tampa Bay or Miami June 11, 2014 at 8:20 pm

    The Rays and Marlins wish they had that many people attend their games and I am dead serious.

    • some guy from the boro June 11, 2014 at 8:27 pm

      and your point is???????

  • k shaw June 11, 2014 at 8:23 pm

    Kyle, less is sometimes more. Posting a “story” every 20 minutes is annoying. The good stories get buried to quick, like puke kid dying

    • eskin swallows cataldi's spunk June 11, 2014 at 11:08 pm

      dude – he went to villanova, he doesn’t know anything about this

    • barfbag June 12, 2014 at 1:39 am

      It would help if he had a sidebar on the left with links to 10 or so of his most recent stories.

  • Mutumbo Fudgehammer June 11, 2014 at 8:32 pm

    Excellent. One step closer to Ruben being axed.

  • Stoop Kid June 11, 2014 at 9:02 pm

    I’m not leaving until Rube is fired. Why would anyone pay money and spend 3+ hours to watch this team? Waste of time. Still a fan but protesting until changes are made. I wouldn’t be so bitter if this was a bunch of developing kids that weren’t winning but vets passed their prime? I’ll pass on that.

    • Bob June 12, 2014 at 10:32 am

      I’d rather watch these vets that I’ve grown up with and watched win a World Series instead of watching the crappy ‘prospects’ Ruben has stocked the minor league teams with or the ‘prospects’ he is incapable in evaluating that we would get in return in a trade. Ruben has to go first or the Phils will be doomed to mediocrity for an even longer time. If Hamels goes before Ruben, then I’m gone too.

  • Steve at the game June 11, 2014 at 9:02 pm

    It certainly is sparse here, but way to post a pic of the stadium during pre-game … when no one is even sitting yet.

    • Chismbop June 12, 2014 at 7:55 am

      Was thinking same thing. Ya don’t need to falsely embellish the shittiness bro, we all live here.

  • Bookit June 11, 2014 at 9:05 pm

    I’ve got a book idea for Mr. Schatz. “Rube & Monty in The Mystery of the Missing Fans.”

  • Matthew Clemens June 11, 2014 at 11:10 pm

    I think I have to throw up ….

  • cous big hairy butt June 12, 2014 at 6:24 am

    way off topic here but wtf is josh iness doing on the radio? does anyone think this douch is funny? “here is the bit”-like he is howard stern-i can’t tell the”bit” from his other not funny nonsense -i am embarrassed for philly radio/ nit wit gcobb was better

    • Jon Marks' Goatee June 12, 2014 at 7:38 am

      But who is worse, Innes or Brace???

      • Informed June 12, 2014 at 8:15 am

        in the 20+ years that i have been actively listening to local sports radio, i have never heard such a piss poor collective group of hosts. between the 2 stations, there is not one current host that makes me want to tune in to listen to them. i actually liked rob ellis when he was in the 6-10 slot. however, once he was switched to afternoons, its apparent that he has become infected by the cum of the the cuz and now he is just like him.

  • Bubbles June 12, 2014 at 8:29 am

    man how creepy does angelo & steven singer sound this morning

    • Informed June 12, 2014 at 8:31 am

      beyond disgusting!

      • Har June 12, 2014 at 8:47 am

        i’m sure that 1 girl angelo is all over saying she looks like kate upton is horrible looking

        • Mikey Mess June 12, 2014 at 1:02 pm

          He says Rhea is sexy, so…

  • Obvious Dude Says June 12, 2014 at 8:30 am

    It’s obvious that over posting is also burying the comments. Commenters can’t keep up or even unite for that matter because they don’t know where to post. Have people moved on to only recent post comments or going back to previous posts?

    Pukemon and K@$13gate live on!!

  • Guesty McGuest June 12, 2014 at 8:48 am

    This kind of low attendance leads to young kids banging in the seats. Mark my words, it will happen by the end of the season that some couple gets caught fucking in the top rung of the Bank.

  • Brent Celek Thincinatti June 12, 2014 at 8:53 am

    Brent Celek Thincinatti

  • DickSuckMcGoo June 12, 2014 at 11:58 am

    The phillies are embarrassing

  • Loke June 12, 2014 at 12:34 pm

    Greedy assed poor managed Phillies. They were all the rage amongst so called phans who went because it was “The thing to do”. No those so called Phans are all gone and guys like me won’t step foot inside after being alienated as a smoker and ripped off as a beer drinker. Phuck you Phillies management! Can’t believe you didn’t see this coming…

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