Cowboys Running Back Joseph Randle Was Reportedly Arrested for Stealing a Bottle of Cologne

With the Giants firmly in the 2014 season’s rearview, it’s time to turn our attention to the stinkin‘ Cowboys, who, as you may have heard, are also 5-1. Backup running back Joseph Randle has played a role in helping them to that record, specifically after rushing for 52 yards against the Seahawks on Sunday… just about 24 hours before being arrested for stealing a bottle of cologne:

Screen Shot 2014-10-14 at 10.30.49 AM

If you steal a bottle of cologne and don’t shout “Yo Holmes, smell you later!” as your signature, you’re doing it wrong.

Randle is making $495,000 this year.

UPDATE: TMZ reports that is was a bottle of Gucci Guilty Black cologne and a two-pack of Polo underwear. Hawt.

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18 Responses

  1. The stupid fuckin’ nigga just can’t seem to break old habits! It’s hard when you’ve been raised to do that dumb shit. About as dumb to think it’s cool to talk stupid! (Ebonics) Only a nigga could think it’s cool to talk stupid!

  2. *homes

    unless this is some sherlock holmes fandom song rewrite reference that i am unaware of….if so, then disregard

  3. If you get paid $495,000 and consider there are 251 working day in a year(I recognize he works more than just during games), then this dude is making $1,972.11 per day of “work”.

    A $100 bottle of cologne he would make in less than 20 mins working. To put this in perspective, this man probably wasted more money in what he stood to gain shop lifting then if he were just working.

    Now I get he is an idiot, he probably isn’t doing this because of the money… but it still blows my mind. He should have a punitive punishment on top of whatever he is going to receive for being so dumb

  4. They have showers at the training facility. Why is he stealing to take a Puerto Rican shower?

  5. As I’ve tried to explanate in the past, this is very clear in it’s apparentence to be obvious racial profiling. This man will be getting atoned for his hardships in this case.

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