GIFs: Brayden Schenn Finally Managed to Shoot the Entire Goalie into the Net

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The vortex of Flyers past opened tonight.

First Mike Richards scored the game-tying goal that would eventually send things to overtime tied 2-2. Then his trade counterpart, Brayden Schenn, proved that when you shoot the puck at the goalie enough, both of them will eventually go in the net. Like Kevin McAllister in Home Alone, if you keep wishing for something to happen, it probably will.

Schenn fired his hardest (with a little help from a stick check) into Jonathan Quick, who, along with the puck, slid across the goal line [GIFs may take a second to load]:

“I made my family disappear. I made my family disappear!”

Schenn was so happy it finally worked! that he did a weird happy dance and then, for some reason, punched Drew Doughty in the stomach:

“Drew baby– I scored one in! I’m on the rooster!”

The vortex spun up as Schenn and Richards briefly chatted about Schenn becoming the next Mike Richards fourth line center who was almost bought out… and discussed if Schenn pushed Quick into the net:

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"No goal. No fucking goal."
“No fucking goal.”


“Bastard shot the whole goalie into the net!”


“I won two Stanley Cups and will probably win another but I’m going to swing my stick like a big baby not old enough to play at Avon Old Farms, Pierre McGuire!”

Matt wonders how this rage is even possible:

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I don’t know, Matt! I don’t know! Only thing I can think is he’s mad that he’ll be the guy who goes down in the record books as the goalie Brayden Schenn was finally able to shoot into the net.

3-2, good guys.


33 Responses

  1. Kyle,

    Will the day ever come when you just drop it? Richards is as good as done. Is it normal for a player with his salary to have two face to face meetings with his GM following a championship season? Meetings where the player has to sit there and convince his boss of his commitment to the team to avoid a buyout. Then for that same GM to trust him so much that he takes a five hour plane ride to Winnipeg, stays at hotel, gets up in the morning, rents a car, and drives three more hours into bumble**** Canada to personally check on the player to see if he is committed. New season starts and he is still on the 4th line for the Kings.
    You cannot lament about bad contracts the Flyers have given out (MacDonald) and complain about those trades. It is very simple math.
    Carter + Richards = $11,022,727 on the cap
    Vorachek + B Schenn + Simmonds + Couturier = $12,475,000
    Difference of $1,452,273
    That is a no brainer.

    1. No one reads long shit like this. You shoukd get a blog and get creative. Meh, too late.

    2. Kinda funny that you equate salary with quality of player when the flyers routinely overpay horrible players

        1. Sean you are speaking absolute perfect logical sense. And when you speak sense and logic to an obsessed person who is in love it falls on deaf ears.

          It doesn’t matter that the Flyers made out better on both deals to Kyle.

          It doesn’t matter that it was Columbus–Not the Flyers–who got fleeced on the Carter deal.

          It doesn’t matter that dumping Richards and his bad attitude and his mediocre play saved the Flyers 13 years with a sour, sullen, enttiled, overpaid and lazy player who insisted on being the team captain no less. And that trading him for Wayne Simmonds, arguably the best player on the Flyers now and Brayden Schenn who may or may not turn into something good, or great saved the Flyers the embarrassment of having to buy Richards out while allowing them to get better player(s) in return.

          If Brayden Schenn becomes a fourth line center (which Richards is) then that trade was a wash. but the Flyers got Simmonds and Schenn. So, the Flyers won BIG on that deal.

          As far as the Stanley Cups? Got news for you. Without Kopitar, Daughty and Quick the Kings don’t win either. In other words if Carter and Richards were the “star” players on the Kings (as they were expected to be and were being paid to be in Philly) and they had a lesser goalie the Glimmer Twins would still have no rings.

          Kyle fails to see this, because he dreamed of hanging out with Carts and Richie spending the night in Old City slipping ruffies into co-eds’ drinks.

          1. How did the Kings do in the playoffs in the years before Carter and Richards arrived?

            How have the Flyers done in the playoffs since trading Carter and Richards?

            Is the point of the NHL to win Stanley Cups or win trades?

          2. Please answer one question for me: if the Flyers never win a Cup with Simmonds, Vorachek and/or Schenn, did they still ‘win’ those trades?

          3. Assisnine and stupid argument.

            A) Carter is a moot point. Flyers traded him to Columbus for Vorachek and Courturier. So, the Kings success or failuer with Carter has nothing to do with the Flyers.

            B) You’d have to go through every single trade ever to evaluate who won what trade when if you’re comparing Stanley Cups over individual players. By that logic the Chicago Cubs did not get the better of the Phillies back in the 80s with the Ryne Sandberg trade because neither team won the World Series…etc. etc.

          4. My comment wasn’t an argument. It was a simple question. Teams only make trades to improve themselves – either long-term or short term – to win a championship. Or to put more $ in the owner’s pocket, I guess, but I don’t think that is applicable in the Flyers case.

  2. Quick is always like this. He’s never ok with losing under any circumstances. Doesn’t matter how much he’s won. He isn’t satisfied with anything less than the best at all times. Maybe the Flyers could use more guys like that big baby.

    Not that it matters. The Kings will keep winning and the Flyers will keep losing.

  3. Great win by the Flyers! 3 in a row (and over 3 really good teams)!

    Fitting that Schenn would net the game-winner too.

    . . . please keep Ghost with the NHL club.

  4. I am done with this site, I take the survey and it says I have unlocked the site and will not have to answer another survey for 7 days yet I come back the next day and there is another survey. Anyone else have this issue?

    1. Yeah it takes litterally 3 seconds to answer the stupid survey question. Nobody actually reads them, they just click what answer is closest to their mouse.


    Right, Kyle?

    Seriously Kyle Scott has written some assisine and stupid things about the Flyers and hockey in general. His overwhelming man-love for Richie and Carts is prime example.

    But stating after one okay game against Boston that Mason is a “top five elite NHL goalie,” may be the dumbest thing he ever said.

    Mason is more likely to be traded at the deadline this year than he is top ever sniff the top five NHL goalie in any category.

  6. Richards has only scored 30 goals or more 2 seasons in his whole career (30, 31). He sucks. Who cares? Which way to jeff carters sea isle house?

    1. According to Kyle Scott, hockey genius, Steve Mason has been busy polishing up his Vezina Trophy acceptance and Hall of Fame induction speeches.

  7. Goalies are 10% physical 90% mental. Mason’s prob doubting himself.
    Emery is doing fine.
    Voracek is not of this Earth.

    1. Mason is a head case who couldn’t take the pressure in Columbus….you know Columbus, Ohio. Hockey Capital of the Universe.

      For some reason Holmgren thought a guy who couldn’t mentally handle playing in Columbus would succeed in Philly.

  8. Whether you like it or not, the flyers blew up a serious, young contender to make room for bryzgalov and have been much worse ever since. Their lack of good talent evaluation is their biggest flaw even more so than the horrendous contracts. If the guys getting those contracts were any good, nobody would care.

    Also, anybody notice how they play better without those two stiffs on IR? Too bad their locked up forever.

    1. I wouldn’t say they’re much worse. Other than the miraculous run in 2009-10, they’re pretty much equal. They’re an average team that makes the playoffs and maybe wins a round or two.

  9. They are the same now as with Richards and Carter.

    2010 they backed into the playoffs on the last day then backed into the Stanley Cup Finals thanks to Boston having seven players injured and to Montreal eliminating Pittsburgh and Washington.

    2011 they barely survived Buffalo in seven games and then got trounced by Boston.

    Had that lucky run in 2010 not happened all indications were Carter and Richards were gone that summer instead of the next.

  10. They signed both to long term deals after that season right?

    Also, I don’t agree with the lucky run theory. Yes, they got in on the last game as a 7 seed but I see that season as an underachieving year anyway. The youth base was very good with carter, Richards, giroux, hartnell, leino plus a good young goalie prospect. Add in veteran leadership with briere, timmonen, pronger and Carle. So, the next season is good regular one and they win a PO round with two sketchy goalies but mgmt freaks out? Crazy. The rest is history.

  11. The Flyers management seem to have a thing for letting go the ones with real potential and picking up the ones who “could be the next big thing”. We got rid of so many good players in return of fluke players it’s rediculous. Mason sucks, period. He’s a guy who had a one good run once like all the other Flyer goalies we saw come and go in the past 10 years. What pissed me off the most was his instagram profile which now seems to have been deleted and with reason. He’s living a pretty flashy lifestyle for someone who hasn’t proved anything yet. The Ferrari in the driveway is a little over the top. It’s gonna be embarassing driving that thing to practice with an AHL club in a few years.

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