NBC 10 and 6 ABC Are Waging a Propaganda War Through Comcast Center Renderings

Actual Philly skyline
Actual Philly skyline

Since today is apparently the day where every columnist has some diagnosis for what’s eating Chip Kelly and the Eagles, and since I can’t even with that, let’s turn our attention to the fun and completely ridiculous propaganda war NBC 10 and 6 ABC are waging via their respective Comcast Center weather report renderings.

Wait, what?

Here is the model NBC uses for its backdrop during FIRST ALERT WEATHER ALL CAPS– notice anything odd?

Voila_Capture 2014-12-16_09-41-00_AM

As you can see, Philadelphia is a cold, dark place, not unlike Gotham between The Dark Knight and The Dark Knight rises. But there’s the (NBC parent company) Comcast Center, towering over the city like a shining beacon of inspiration keeping careful watch over this urban hellscape, where a river of tears (and probably oil) dares inhabitants to swin to greener pastures where entire swaths of cities aren’t rendered as rows of torn down sheetrock. The Comcast Center is not the hero Philly deserves, but it’s the one it needs. Oh and it’s also roughly a BILLION feet tall and dwarfs those other buildings, some of which are, in reality, just 130 feet or so shorter.

Meanwhile, over on 6 ABC, which is decidedly not owned by Comcast, the cable giant’s tower plays a much different role in the city’s skyline:

Voila_Capture 2014-12-16_09-41-36_AM

Center City buildings and landmarks are rendered beautiful in full-color. Trees sprout from 12th Street in euphoric jubilation as though someone poured Herbel Essences all over their roots. Ohhhhhh yes! Yes! Yes! YES! There might be two Kimmel Centers. A wall of weeping row homes stand guard against an attack from the west or Wynewood. And then there’s the Comcast Center… the city’s Death Star, blackened and appearing as though it’s a poorly drawn shadow cast by the old Bell Atlantic Tower, Philly’s original thumb drive from before there were thumb drives.

It’s a tale of two cities on local news weather reports. In which do you live?

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20 Responses

  1. I like ABC’s, where the horizon is nothing but three-story row homes and every third person owns a white Chevy minivan.

  2. On the ABC screenshot, there are 47 brick rowhomes across the back and I wonder how much crack per day is dealt from those rowhomes.

    1. Breaking news. In a study just published by a commenter whose username resembles a distended anus, everyone who ever lived in a row home deals crack. Every person. Ever. In the history of mankind building adjacent two- to three-story houses out of brick.

      We’ll have more as this develops.

  3. This is about as fuckin’ stupid as it gets!
    Saying “wait what” is about as childish as it gets! My 12 year old granddaughter and her friends say that all the time! Wait what? Wait what?

  4. On slow news days, do you think Jim and Kyle jack off into each other’s faces “just to see what it’s like”?

  5. NBC’s is just utterly ridiculous, and laughable. Can’t wait until the 2nd tower is constructed and they render it to be equivalent to the Burj Khalifa.

  6. The story about the dude in the cowboy shirt getting kicked out of the eagles game is more newsworthy and relevant.

  7. Was going to attack Philthydelphia… but wait!
    Row homes too difficult an obstacle to overcome!
    We attack Baltimore instead!

    1. They actually did try to hire an editor. But unfortunately, nobody on Craigslust nor Munster got back to them. They might have to try CareerBilder.

  8. What does this have to with anything? Calling this a “Propaganda War” is a bit of stretch don’t you think Kyle? Basically, NBC is highlighting its own, while ABC does the same. Why is this even a post? Why am I even commenting on this? Is this a dream? Mom?

    #FIREJIM

  9. congratulations on your first interesting post in a while. those are some good points you made. the one that really sticks out is how tall they made the comcast building. that has to be intentional.

  10. the all seeing Eye of Sauron.

    Google the Owl building in Austin Tx. it’s built to resemble the Egyptian Owl God Moloch.

  11. Am I the only one who stopped reading after “I can’t even”? Are you having your wife write these posts for you?

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